Stay Quiet || William Afton

one

tw: alcohol mention, depressive episode mention

Willow's POV

I unlocked the door.

Even after five years, they still hadn't installed street lights on this block. It was dark.

I walked inside the home and flipped on the kitchen lights, sighing as I took my shoes off.

My rough hands rubbed my eyes as I walked over to the kitchen table and set the grocery bag down. I walked to the sink and wet my face with cold water.

"Mommy?" He came over with his plushie.

"Michael, why are you still awake? It's 12 AM." I looked at the four year old from over the counter.

"I was scared you weren't coming home. It's late." He held tighter on the plush.

I sighed and rubbed my face. "Of course I'm coming home. I have no choice. Please go back to bed."

Michael opened his mouth to speak, but Maggie walked into the room.

"Come on Michael." Maggie picked him up. "Bedtime."

She walked away with the kid over her shoulders.

That one night on William's birthday left me with this. I didn't even know I was going to have his child months later. I for sure won't forget that night now.

It's not that I don't love Michael. I just don't have the mental stability to show him that I love him. I can't even look at him sometimes, he just looks so much like his father.

Times when he can't sleep and he walks into the dining room and finds me asleep on the table with a half empty wine bottle next to me, he can't help but poke me and ask me if I'm okay and to go to bed.

He even has his accent. I thought an accent was something you learned.

It's so hard to just be around him sometimes only because he's so much like William.

I want to be able to do things with Michael that wouldn't send me into a depressive episode just because it all takes me back.

I sat at the table and pulled the Oreo cake out of the bag, along with purple candles. Purple was his favorite color.

I like to think that if William really is dead, then maybe he was reincarnated as Michael. But at the same time, I don't know If someone can be reincarnated as their son.

Because sometimes Michael says weird things.

Like for example, he said he had a dream I killed someone at Circus Baby's. I rarely take him to Circus Baby's now just because of that.

But Maggie understands. She understands why I feel what I feel and why I am the way I am. She takes care of Michael for me when I can't. I feel terrible about it.

I feel like a deadbeat mother. I feel like my own mother.

I shouldn't have my sister take care of my child. But if that kid can have someone who can show them love for at least a little while longer, then I hope Maggie can stay up for the job.

I opened the top cover of the cake, and began placing  candles around it in a circle. I lit them all up with a cheap lighter I got.

I even bought a cake cutter and paper plates and forks, because I knew once I sat down at the table I wouldn't be getting up for the rest of the night.

I let a singular tear fall from my face, as it stood expressionless. I set the lighter down.

"You have to stop beating yourself up about it." Maggie came into the kitchen.