Lost Innocence

CHAPTER 21

"when I was in my junior middle school I was a problematic child, I was involved in a sorority" Sean again lowered his head while the others was shocked in his revelation

"sorority of drug addicts and criminals" Sean continued all just stayed silent listening to Sean's shocking past

"that's when I met him... I was 13 that time but I'm still the one who saved him" Josh continued as Sean went silent

"he was in a high that time when he tried to kill himself" Josh added

"I was a suicidal type you see" Sean confessed

"I felt so lost... so alone... those times being young and curios teenager I got addicted to drugs, whenever I felt a negative emotion I used drugs to forget all of it until I became a criminal myself" Sean looked at his hands

"I once rob a bank with them, once I also did beat someone for no reason, I once found pleasure in violence and in self harm... I honestly one time did hang myself I nearly died but my mother found me, though that didn't stop me I continued" he stopped and hesitated for a while

"the moment I truly lost my innocence is the first time I killed someone" his voiced cracked then he felt a hand in his lap he looked at Darcel with his tear-stained face

"I may be a criminal but I never killed someone until that time I killed a man" he said his voice shaking his tears freely flowed down his cheeks while he is still looking at Darcel who is looking back at him with a blank face

Sean's biggest fear now is looking at the man he fell in love with, telling him his dark past ad the thought that the man he was looking at right now will hate him 'I'm again losing everything before I can even start anything' Sean's heart was breaking 'there is no way he can accept me right?' Sean cried more

"and a poor innocent child" Sean completely broke down finally letting all his burden go in front of his new friends and the man who is occupying his heart the thought of him losing them because of the mistakes he did in the past is just killing him

"it wasn't your fault" Josh said

"it was" Sean

"I was there when the man forced Sean to kill the child but Sean resisted, he shot the man killing him but the bullet pass through that man's chest killing the child behind" Josh explained

"after that time he wanted to correct everything and fix his life so he tried to leave the sorority but they didn't allow him so they tried to overdose him with drugs but he manage to escape but he was to high to know what's going on around him I just followed him saw him trying to kill himself" he added while Darcel abandoned his hesitation and pulled Sean in his embrace

"I manage to stop him I also helped him get out of that organization" everyone was so silent after that only Sean's cry can be heard

Without speaking Darcel dragged Sean in his room and locked the room

"that child.... I killed that child" Sean murmured while standing in the middle of the room with lowered head

"Sean" Darcel called out to him but he seems to not hear anything now even his eyes aren't moving

"I killed an innocent child" he laughed lowly

"he died" he said while his hands went in his head he started pulling his hair so Darcel acted fast and stop him

"Sean stop it" Darcel said but Sean still didn't look at him