Kokoro (A Shourtney/Shartney Fanfic)

Seven

I waited alone outside the restaurant where we were going to have our date. He was running a little late which wasn't too big a deal because I was late too. My mind kept returning to the question of "Is this a good idea?". I have yet to truly find the right answer if I'm being honest. I know it shouldn't be that difficult but I'm torn honestly. Going out on a date to forget about the feelings I have for Shayne honestly feels like...I'm cheating on him. Even though...we aren't even dating...

"Hey, sorry I'm late," a voice snapped me out of my thoughts. The guy was pretty cute honestly. Dirty blonde hair, muscly, blue eyes and...dammit. I've chosen someone exactly like Shayne, haven't I?

"N-no, it's fine!" I quickly said. "I was a bit late too so I guess we're both fine."

"That's a relief. Well, shall we go inside?" He gestured towards the door. He seems like a good guy, a guy I could fall for. We found our table and sat across from one another. The guy, Josh, seemed kinda nervous.

"So, it's nice to finally meet you in person," I said. "I've gotta be honest, I was really nervous about going on this date."

"No, I understand. I'm the same way honestly," he said with a slight chuckle. "I've not been on many."

"Yeah, it's been a while for me so I guess it's kinda weird for both of us, huh?"

"Yeah" the two of us laughed but it was still kinda awkward. I didn't know what to talk about really. My mind kept circling back to Shayne but I guess Josh's similarities really didn't help that.

"How...how do you get over someone?" I hasn't realized but my thoughts managed to escape my lips.

"Well, that's a pretty tough question," he said. He didn't seem at all weirded out about what I said. "Is there someone you're trying to get over or...?"

"No, I just...well...I was just curious to be honest," I lied. "What would you do if you had a crush on someone and wanted to get over them?"

"Fortunately, I have some experience in this field. I was once in a situation where I fell in love with my best friend but she had herself a boyfriend already so, you can see why I'd want to give up on how I felt."

"Oh, yeah, that's a terrible situation."

"Yeah. Anyway, I got over her by doing things that distracted me like writing or drawing, etc. The one thing that helped me the most was definitely dating and-"

"Wait, wait, you said dating, right?"

"I did."

I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE.

"Sorry, I just, I decided to do that when I was getting over someone I liked before and my friends thought I was crazy for it," I sighed. "So...so that really worked?"

"It did actually," he said. "Putting my focus on someone else and enjoying spending time with them really helped me out."

"Well, that's a good thing."

"It certainly is. I would definitely agree," he said, a smile forming on his face. "So, tell me some things about yourself, Courtney. I'm curious."

"Well, I work as an actor and director for a YouTube channel. Have you ever heard of Smosh?"

"I have. I used to watch their videos a while back. That's actually really cool!"

"Yeah. I've been on that channel for about seven years now."

"So, what's it like working there? I'd always wondered about how things had worked and stuff, you know?"

"Oh, it's a lot of fun. When you think about working at a company, most people think that's boring but it's truly great. I have a lot of friends there like my boss or Sh-"

My mind was flooded with the thought of Shayne. While I was talking, I imagined several fun memories I've had over the years but...he was there in every single one.

"Or?" Josh seemed curious.

"Ah, sorry, just one of my coworkers. His name is Shayne and he's...kind of a weird one. He's stupid, makes a bunch of dumb jokes whenever he gets the chance. I'm surprised you have never heard him scream from across the state."

"Is he, perhaps, the one you're trying to get over?" His words surprised me. How did he know? Was it that obvious?

"Uh...well...you got me."

"I'm kinda curious though...why exactly are you trying to get over him?" He asked.

"I...well, he's been my friend, dare I say best friend, for so long. I don't want to have these feelings get in the way of our friendship. I've had it happen before so...you know..."

"Why are you so sure of that? I mean, you could both be in the same place. You never truly know."

"You sound like Saige," I laughed.

"Well, this Saige girl has a point."

I sighed, placing my head on my hand, looking out of the window next to me. It started raining.

"Courtney, I think you should talk to him about this," he said. "I feel like the two of you have something special even if I haven't actually met this guy."

"I-I don't really know..." I said. Maybe...maybe he's right? I mean, I guess he would know, wouldn't he? I groaned and threw my forehead onto the table in frustration. What am I going to do?