SALIGIA SERIES #1: SUPERVIA

XVI

"Pwede bang bitawan mo na ako?" I sniff as I murmur those words habang marahang itinutulak ang braso niya upang matanggal ang pagkakapulupot noon sa bewang ko. But to my dismay, her arms just snake tighter around me.

"Not until we talk about what you told me earlier and why you're so upset with me." She said nonchalantly while looking down at me, her ocean blue eyes piercing me as I stay still sitting on her lap.

Ni hindi ko nga alam paano kami napunta sa ganitong posisyon. Just a while ago, I was bawling my eyes out for the most bizarre reasons that I have for her. Matapos kong sabihing hindi ko siyang gusto, kahit pa alam na alam ko sa sarili ko na hindi naman iyon ang gusto kong iparating sa kanya, she just smiled at me like a fucking idiot. Carried me in a bridal style at naupo sa sun lounge kung saan niya ako natagpuan and before I even knew it, I was sitting on her lap at ni hindi makaalis sa pagkakayakap niya sa akin.

"Wala tayong dapat pag-usapan, so let go of me Emir." I said tasting the bitterness at the back of my throat habang sinasabi iyon. I couldn't help but protrude my lips and look away, sinusubukang itago sa kanya ang nairitang mukha.

"You need to tell me things, Selena. So, I would understand and tend to your needs." Malambing niyang saaad sa gilid ng tenga ko. Pakiramdam ko ay nagsimula na namang uminit ang magkabilang pisngi ko ng rumihistro sa akin ang sinabi niya.

Tend to my needs?! Oh my! What the hell does she meant by those words!!!

It sounded like I'm being needy of her! I'm not and I will never be! I'm trying too!!!

"I told you I don't have a problem! Kaya bitawan mo na ako! Ivah is probably looking for me!"

"Ivah will probably pick up when she realized that both of us are gone."

"Kahit pa! I want to go home, Emir!"

"Then we'll go home together. I will take you home." I was taken aback when she whispers those words with determination in her face as she looks at me with those oozing eyes.

Parang sinasabi ng mukha niya na hindi niya ako papakawalan hanggat hindi nangyayari ang gusto niya. Ang pag-usapan ang nangyari at ihatid ako pauwi. Hindi naman siya mamatay kung hindi naman iyon gagawin! This girl and her persistency are really outmatched!

"I want to take a bath first... before we talk." Hindi ko napigilan ang pag-iwas ng tingin ng sabihin iyon sa kanya. As if I'm admitting defeat.

Nang maramdamang lumuwag ang pagkakapit niya sa akin ay parang magkung anong lumubog sa akin. My skin suddenly feels cold when her warn arms let go of me. Marahan akong tumayo at kinuha na ang gamit sa gilid niya, naghahanda ng umalis.

Ngunit bago pa man ako maka-isang hakbang ay agad na dumapo ang kamay niya sa kamay ko. I almost jump on my feet when I felt the spark when out fingertips touched. I immediately withdraw from her hands. 

When my eyes find hers, pakiramdam ko ay agad na lumubog ang puso ko to see a shadow of dismay and pain in it. 

People might see us! How can she be so bold and be chill at the same time!?

Gusto kong kunin ang kamay niya at hawakan 'yon ng mahigpit, pero imbis na gawin iyon ay mahigpit ko na lamang hinakan ang bag na dala-dala. Actually fearing what I might do when feelings overwhelm me. 

Hindi ko na siya nagawa pang bigyan ng pangalawang tingin at nauna nang maglakad papuntang parking lot. She was just silently walking behind me, not even matching my pace.

Even on the whole ride home, the silent stayed between us. Hindi na muling nagsalita si Emir at tahimik lamang na nagmamaneho pauwi. I didn't utter another word dahil pakiramdam ko ay hindi naging maganda ang timpla niya matapos kong hilahin ang kamay ko mula sa kanya.