"I told you to leave me be. If I need you I will summon you," I quipped. Footsteps still proceeded into my chambers. I turned my attention from my window towards the entrance. I uttered the smallest gasp. It wasn't my maidservant defying my wishes to be left in solitude, like I expected.
"King David," I whispered. I did not dare to bow, not only because of the pain it would cause my abdomen, which was still healing, but out of defiance.
"Bathsheba, I did not mean to disturb you."
He inched closer still. I noticed as the sunlight crept over his face, eradicating the shadow from the doorway, that his eyes were puffy and red. His face looked sunken in and pale. He was grieving just as much as me. This knowledge did nothing to soften my hatred towards him.
"Why have you come," I asked, dispensing with useless formalities. The sooner he told me why he was here the sooner I could get him to leave my presence.
My heart began to pick up its pace. Surely he wouldn't take me to his bed this soon after giving birth? Would he defy mosaic law to feed his own selfish desires? Not committing murder was a mosaic law as well. It was clear he believed himself to be above God's law.
"I wanted to see how you were healing. I had heard that you were walking on palace grounds yesterday. It gave me hope you would be ready-"
"- No! I am not ready, My Lord. Please don't ask that of me."
I backed up tentatively.
His face fell. He took a step forward but then seemed to think better of it and stepped back. Then, raised his hands toward me- indicating he meant me no harm. Too late.
"Is that all you think of me, Bathsheba? I am not here for that. I care about you- Bathsheba. I almost lost you. I almost lost you, Bathsheba!!!"
My eyes widened at his outburst of anger. I was paralyzed. I didn't know whether to stay still or run and hide from his wrath. My indecision kept me motionless. My silence encouraged him to continue his raving.
"I have been wrong about so many things, Bathsheba. God is punishing me for them. I never meant for you to be punished too. You don't deserve it. But I will make you this promise: You will be first among my wives and highest in my court. And your son will be my heir."
"My son is dead," I spit venomously.
He nodded his head solemnly.
"We don't have to discuss it now. When you're ready. Whatever you have need of let me know and I will provide it for you. Whatever you desire. It will be yours."
"What if I want you dead?!"
Tears began to spill down my cheeks. My lip trembled. The betrayal I felt inside my chest felt like it would cave in on me. I once trusted David with my life. I called him friend. I thought I knew him.
"I have loved you since you were fifteen years old. I tried to deny it all these years, but when I saw you on your rooftop, I couldn't resist you anymore. I should have married you before Uriah ever had the chance to. That was my mistake. I deserve death, you are right. Are you going to kill me Bathsheba?"
I stared at him in silence. More angry tears spilled down my cheeks.
"No you wouldn't kill me. You'd have Zev do it, wouldn't you? Zev won't be a problem for us any longer, Bathsheba. Get some rest."
He exited my chambers with succinct steps. He never glanced back at me. I collapsed onto the floor. I should have kept my mouth shut. I clasped my mouth with both hands, stifling the sob that began to wrack me. My friend was in danger and probably already dead because of me. Guilt consumed me. All I could do was cry.
YOU ARE READING
The Gaze of a King
Historical Fiction|FEATURED IN HISTORICAL FICTION| Her whole life she had been called beautiful. Glances and envious eyes were always cast her way. But never had Bathsheba expected to catch the eye of her King. And never in her wildest imaginings did she anticipate t...
