Amongst the worst

Secrets, lies and deception

I believe everyone is broken in their own way, whether it is mentally or physically. Me for example I know I am, and I blame my father for that. He caused me so much pain throughout the years I'm glad he's gone. No one really knows where he and my mother are and maybe it's better that way. Although mother is gone, I am still going to write in this journal. It helps me in some way to express my feelings and emotions and gives me someone to talk to. I know I can talk to my siblings but I can't exactly talk about them to
them. And of course there are some things I don't intend on ever telling them to their face. My uncle Chris has been acting stranger than usual and honestly, aunt Lena hasn't been acting any better. They seem to want to tell us something then back off. When I asked them they said it was nothing but I know them too well. -Rose Anderson

I shut my journal and put it back under my pillow. I let out a sigh and threw myself off my bed trying to convince my body to go and have breakfast. I throw on my favourite grey hoodie that used to be my mum's once and put on my a pair of shorts and ran downstairs. "Morning!" I said while yawning.

"Morning sleepy head" yelled Lena from the other side of the room. She smiled at me and placed a plate of food on the table. "I made your favourite". I could tell she was nervous about something.

"You alright aunty?" I asked

"Yes of course why wouldn't I be." she said with her thick French accent while smiling again. I knew she was lying.

Lena was my mothers sister and Chris was my fathers brother. They told my siblings and I our parents sent them over to us so we'd have someone to look over us when they go. Lena and my mother are originally from France and Chris and my father were born and raised in London, where we live now. My mother always offered to teach me French but for some reason my father never wanted me to learn. Apart from English my father was fluent in 3 other languages Italian, French and German. The only one of my siblings who is fluent in a language apart from English is Greyson. He is fluent in French and he knows a fair bit of German. He is the oldest and my father's first child. Axel was born almost straight after he was born, then Claire, the twins, then me.

Unlike Greyson neither of us knew any other languages although Axel did pick up on some French and Greyson would secretly teach him then get a beating after. Our father had a special hatred for Greyson and I never knew why. I once walked in on him hitting him so hard that Greyson had tears in his eyes and I would always try to help or stand in the way but he wouldn't even hesitate and would hit me even harder.

Greyson never cried since then, it's as if he switched off his emotions.

I don't blame him.

I walked to the table and took a seat in between Claire and Axel. As soon as I sat down Axel moved his seat closer and messed my hair up with his hand and I stick up my middle finger, completely avoiding eye contact. He pretended to look shocked "Aunt, Rose sh-she gave me the finger!" he shouted out an an alarming rate

I closed my ears and shot him a death stare. Ashton and Aidan burst into laughter opposite us and gave me a thumbs up. Claire just gave me her usual glare that signalled to eat my food. I picked up my knife and fork and began shoving food into my mouth.

"Where's Grayson?" I asked, a mouthful of food still in my mouth.

"You know it's rude to talk when you have food in your mouth." Claire said while looking at me in disgust. I just smiled at her.

"So where is" I began to say.

"He's downstairs probably punching the living daylights out of that punching bag" Axel interrupted. 

"Of course he is" I said with a sigh. Greyson was treated as a soldier when my father was around. He taught him different things like piano. Which Greyson eventually taught me, I've even grown to like playing it. Our father would always tell him that every man must master an intrument. Greyson would always tell me that father would force him to play everyday for hours with him watching.