The Mishaps Of Kusuo Saiki And Various Other Less Important Characters

SUMMON THE CLONES

It's been a busy few days. After school today I think I'll just go home and sleep, plus, there's a pack of coffee jelly in the fridge right now and it's calling my name. I can't wait to just get home and relax. It'll be great, I haven't had a chance to really sit back and just take some time for myself  in ages-

"KUSUOOOO! We should totes go on a date later today." There goes all my plans.

Why?

"What do you mean 'why?' Is it not normal for couples to go on dates?" Aiura took my arm and started playing with a strand of her hair.

We're not a couple.

"Oh well. What if we go to that cafe you like?" 

Sure.

My plans have been cancelled out by other plans. I guess it couldn't hurt, though, I'll go out with her for an hour and then go home and sleep. No big deal.

"Cool, you'll come pick me up after school once you get changed. See you!" She skipped off. Finally, I can get to class. Good grief-

"Saiki! It's great to see you!" Teruhashi stopped me in my tracks. What now? "I- I was wondering if you might like to go somewhere with me later? I didn't have any plans today and I figured you wouldn't either." That was unintentionally derogatory. 

"If he says no and breaks Teruhashi's heart I'll beat him to a pulp!"

"He'd be insane to reject her! It's Teruhashi!"

"Why's he hesitating?"

We've drawn a crowd..

...Sure. 

Teruhashi almost responded with "offu." 

"OKAY- I'LL MEET YOU AT YOUR HOUSE LATER!" She ran back to class blushing and giggling while every other guy in the universe tried to melt a hole in my head with their eyes.

While now I'm in a pickle, but it's no different from any other day. I've already figured out a solution-

"SAIKI-SANNN!"

"Kusuo!"

Oh my god. What now?

"We need you to come to Akechi's house later for a REALLY IMPORTANT MEETING. IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT SO YOU HAVE TO COME."

Can't. Sorry, Toritsuka.

"Oh, don't joke around like that, Kusuo. We know you don't have plans, you never do! We'll see you there." Akechi took Toritsuka away before I could respond.

It's okay, I have a plan.

...

My clones definitely aren't refined, but it's all I can do. There's no way to be in three places at once unless you're me.

I'll go with Aiura. You stay here and wait for Teruhashi, and dress nice. Here's Akechi's address for you.

"I know Akechi's address, good grief."

"Yeah, and I know to dress nicely for Teruhashi. Good grief."

"Good grief."

Cut that out. Make your voice deeper so she doesn't get suspicious.

"I can't just do that. You make it deeper."

"Are you trying to make him more attractive for her?"

Well, no, but he's definitely not attractive anyway. Enough.

Clone number one has a shoe size that's one size larger. He's got a bigger nose, a really odd sense of style, he's taller and he's got facial hair. It's minor, though, so hopefully Teruhashi won't notice. I'll remind him to shave before he leaves.