Broken Ties

5 Dreams

Allys pov
"Ally?" I turned the lamp on to see dom stood in the doorway, his whole body jumping every time he took in a breath to sob "D...did I wake you. It's alright i...if I did. I can go back?" He was trying really hard to speak clearly at the end and I was proud of him for that
"Come sit with me."
"No. I hate you. I fucking hate you." I couldnt comprehend why he'd suddenly switched
"Dom I'm sorry. I'm really sorry just sit down."
"I hate you." He screamed, in much the same tone that I had screamed at him in "I fuckin hate you. And the stupid kid!" That didn't sound like dom. He walked over to me, gripping my shoulders and shaking me and...

"Ally snap out of it. You're having a nightmare." I woke up to ben shaking my shoulders. That explains the turn in dom. It wasn't him at all. It was just the fears in my head making up stupid stories. I didn't warn Ben before I gripped him. I held him tight because in that scary moment he was the only thing I could comprehend as being real. And safe. He felt really fucking safe to me "It's alright I got you. I know you're not supposed to wake people up from nightmares. But didn't seem right to let you suffer." I adjusted my head to be in a more comfy position, settling into a hug rather than a desperate grip "Lucky I came to get my stuff eh?" I nodded "You alr-"
"Not yet." He chuckled
"Okay. As long as you need."
"Promise?"
"I promise you. I'm here to make you feel safe." I nodded, resting my head move to on his stomach since he was stood up and I was sat on the edge of the bed "So what was it about?"
"Dom. He was all sad and then he turned and was suddenly angry. Think I feel guilty about hurting him. But maybe I'm scared and that's why he got angry. I don't know."
"You very clever analysing your dreams like that." He played with my hair and his gentle praise calmed me down even more, making me pull away and look up at him
"You think so? I think I'm just weird reading into it." He smiled
"No it's good. Helps you learn what's in here" he tapped my head before gently holding my face and kissing my forehead "You alright now?"
"Thank you. For not leaving me here."
"It's okay." He stroked my cheek with his thumb before letting go of my face and instead holding his hand out "come on. You need to use that big brain to talk to dom."
"But last night-"
"I know what happened last night. Dom texted me. But I think he needs to hear about this dream." I really didn't want to but I trusted him when he said it was the right thing to do. So against my gut and every fibre of my being I took his hand "Good girl. It'll make it better I promise."

"Go on." Ben whispered "I'll be right outside here okay?" He noticed I was nervous "Do you need a hug?" I nodded and he pulled me in for a brief hug "It's okay. You just need to talk about things. This up and down isn't good for anyone."
"Especially not Sam." I jumped a little hearing does voice, pulling away from ben to see him in the doorway behind him "Do you want him in the room?"
"No. Its okay. He can go back to jen now."
"He's going to wait for you. Because I know it makes you feel safer." I nodded and he softly took my hand in his "Do you want to come and talk about it in my room. Or downstairs?"
"Downstairs." He walked slowly and guided me down them, walking into the living room. I sat down on the sofa as he released his grip
"Benji will be upstairs."
"Benji? That's cute as fuck." He chuckled, sitting down beside me
"Yeah. Called him that since I was younger. He's a sweet guy who always looked out for me growing up." I smiled, resting my cheek on his shoulder
"He's moving out with jenny. Said he'd stay for me if I wanted him to. Feel like maybe I made the wrong decision to ask him."
"He makes you feel safe. Don't feel bad about wanting that."
"Had a dream. Or a nightmare kinda. You were so upset. But then you said you hated me and the baby. And you shook me." He didn't react and at first I thought he was angry but when I moved away to look at him he was only watching me with the most caring look on his face
"That all? Was it that muddled up?"
"Yeah. Think it's cos I felt guilty for upsetting you. And maybe I was scared you were angry. Well you were so I guess i wasn't wrong there." I settled back down again because I didn't want to look at him anymore "I didn't mean to cry."
"It's okay. You have doubts and maybe I shouldn't have got so frustrated with you. But it still hurts me that you don't trust I love you." He was speaking calmly and it made me sleepy if anything
"But why would you love me. I broke your heart. So I can't understand why you still call me baby. And tuck me in. And why you just fucking love me at all." He sighed
"I get it now. I thought it was doubt in me. But its doubt in yourself." I nodded
"Yeah." I mumbled "I didn't sleep much last night. Can I have a cuddle and a nap?" He chuckled at my attempt to make it better. A caring one though. Not mocking me like most probably would. He did sigh though
"You can go have a nap in the bed?"
"Do you not wanna join me? I know you probably didn't sleep much either."
"I have some stuff I need to get done later so we can't sleep for long."
"What stuff?"
"Just some work stuff." He kissed the top of my head "Trust me I'd love to spend time here with you but I have things to get sorted before baby is here."
"Can I come with you?"
"Yeah. If you want I don't see why not." I smiled "I'm sorry I didn't understand you. The whole time I thought you weren't believing me. All you needed was reassurance that you're worthy." I nodded "You know you are right?"
"Working on it. But I just want you to hold me right now. Helps me feel loved." He kissed the top of my head again
"Like I said. We could be that close with clothes on. No ones stopping us."
"Promise not to cry this time."
"No. You can cry because it shows me you're feeling things. You can talk to me about things you feel. I promise I'm not gonna make it about me."
"But how do you feel about it. Cus you sounded like you were gonna cry." He sighed
"I hate that you made me feel like it was dirty. You made out like the reason I was saying those things was because we were naked. But it wasn't." He wasn't angry, but he was talking quite paced as though he was carefully thinking about how he was going to express it
"But it felt that way to me. I know it's not but it felt like it was."
"I know. Its okay we can go for a nap now."
"If I kissed you again would you push me away. Because I want us to be that close again eventually."
"Ally of course I wouldn't. Not if you were ready. But you're not and that's okay." I nodded "Now cmon. If you wanna get that nap in let's go."
"I'm sorry."
"Stop apologising for fucks sake." Although he didn't yell I did recoil from him and curl up on the couch. He realised he'd done wrong and stood up "Do you still want me up there?"
"Yeah." I mumbled "If you do."
"I do. Come on sweetheart."
"Baby. I like it when you call me ally baby. Because it makes me feel like nothing went wrong." I looked up at him with teary eyes and he just smiled
"Ally, baby, we need to go to bed now if you want a nap of any substance."
"Okay." I got up and took him by the hand to lead him upstairs, encountering Ben who was leaving his room with a bag of stuff
"Was about to check on you two. Everything okay then?" I let go of dom and he went into his room, leaving me with Ben. I didn't quite know what to say so I just kissed his cheek and gave him a hug. He hugged me back and sighed softly "Glad you're happy. I'll see you soon yeah?"
"Okay." I let go and started heading back to dom
"Sweeter dreams kid. I'll check up on you later tonight."
"Thanks Benji." He smiled
"Love that nickname. Dom's not called me that seriously in years."
"Bringing it back. Uncle Benji. It's cute." He walked over to me
"Not as cute as you." He kissed my forehead "I've gotta go. See you soon." I watched as he walked downstairs and heard the door go
"You joining me?" I jumped because I was too interested in Ben to notice that dom had opened the door and stood behind me "You love him don't you?" I nodded but was still for some reason staring down the stairs "Come on. I wanna cuddle with you baby." I nodded "Are you okay?"
"He's the first one to just love me for nothing. He doesn't have to live here or stay for me but he does. And he doesn't get anything out of it. If anything I'm a burden." He sighed
"I hate it when you shit on yourself like that. Come to bed." I nodded and walked through as he held it open for me
"I'm sorry." I mumbled
"It's alright. Just see yourself like I do."
"How is that?" I goaded, laying down in the bed
"Fucking amazingly. Now come on and nap or ill have to leave you and Sammy here." He shuffled over and got himself comfortable, eventually settling in us laying face to face on our side "I adore you sweet girl." He put his hand on the side of my face and then closed his eyes "Gonna hold my baby like this okay?"
"Okay dommy."
"I love you." He mumbled, making me smile
"Are we okay?"
"Yeah baby. Love you more than any stupid argument." I sighed "Do you wanna cuddle properly?"
"I like to snuggle into your neck." He smiled, still with his eyes closed
"Cmon then." He let go and let me get comfortable "Right there?"
"Yep."
"Sleep well sweetheart." He kissed the top of my head
"Night dommy."