Faking It • Queen FanFiction

Cʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ 25

"I really wish there was something I could do, Bernie," rang the sound of Brian's soft voice that calmed Bernie's jittery mood the next evening. All day she'd been unable to keep both her body and her mind still. If it wasn't her leg bouncing, it was her fingers twitching, or her tongue folding in on itself, or her toes curling and uncurling, or her jaw clenching. And at the same time her brain was incapable of keeping itself quiet, even when she was trying to concentrate on something else. Unfortunately, most of her mental conflict was surrounding Holden and the conversation she'd had last night with Flo. Things really did have to change, and now here Bernie was telling her lifelong best friend about all of her woes. Brian made for an exceptionally adequate listener.

"Me too. Although just you caring is enough," Bernie sighed, putting her elbow on the arm of the sofa and rubbing her temple with her free hand that wasn't clutching the phone.

"For now. We just don't know what he's going to do next. He's already threatened to jump Roger."

"I know, I know, Brian. But we can't afford anywhere else, not until Flo gets her pay rise and I join the police force after passing my exam. If I pass..." Soon it was Bernie's theory and physical exams that would determine whether or not she was qualified to join the police force as an officer. So for her it was basically a life or death situation.

"Bernie don't be like that, of course you'll pass! You're my Bernie, and my Bernie doesn't fail."

A smile that Brian was blind to graced Bernie's face and she reminded herself for the millionth time that she didn't deserve Brian. "Well, she'll certainly try not to. Now I have a goal, to get my arse outta here...hey! Only temporarily, until I pass my exam, I'll pay you, could I stay with you?" Even though Brian was her best mate, she still felt slightly awkward offering herself a place to live at his flat.

"Oh Bernie, you know I would and I think it'd be great-"

"But...?" Bernie interjected, she knew that tone and heard the hook in his voice.

"Chrissie is moving in with me later this month. In a week and a half, actually." Brian's voice took on a quieter and more nervous tone. This was a big step for him: Bernie knew he'd never been in a serious relationship like his one with Chrissie before and wanted to see good things for the both of them.

"Oh my God, Brian, that's great! Screw my problems, let's talk about this! So, how'd it happen?" And then her problems were temporarily abandoned whilst she coaxed Brian into gossiping with her about his devotion to his girlfriend. And although Bernie's issues were set aside, they didn't go away. Deliberate ignorance never resolved anything.

"Oh and Bernie," the conversation halted half an hour later with Bernie's need for disappearance to have a shower, "I have a genuine question, and don't get angry."

"No promises." She twiddled the telephone cord round her finger mindlessly, ready to either freak or laugh.

"Do you like Roger? As more than a friend, I mean."

Where had that come from? One moment they were contemplating how Brian would fit all of Chrissie's clothes in his house and the next Roger's name had been thrown into the mix, but not in a pleasant way. This question, however, couldn't be answered straight away and the line went silent as she sat staring at her knees mindlessly, formulating her answer. In all honesty, she'd been thinking about Roger amidst her bundle of disorganised thoughts. Not that she'd meant to, he'd just slipped in accidentally with his gruff voice, generosity, unexpected compassion and hair. Oh, his hair. How she wanted to rake her hands through it endlessly...

"Of course not," Bernie tried to argue, but she wasn't convincing herself let alone the person that knew her better than even she did; her voice came out all high pitched and uncharacteristically girly.

"Shit, Bernie, yes you do! Look, you've got to snap out of it. He's a motherfucker. Probably quite literally in some cases." Brian scolded and she felt extremely parented, which she didn't mind. Her curly haired best friend had often acted as the loving parent she'd never fully experienced, but what she didn't need was him telling her things she already knew. Mainly because it only made it more real.

"I know, I know! The bastard was just so kind when I'd broken my ankle and it's difficult to forget that." Dropping the phone cord, her hand resumed to massaging her throbbing temples. Things were just too hard at the minute to be stressing over boys.

"Well try! It's a Tuesday night, the band and I just got back from the pub and we left Roger there feeling up some girl." The thought of Roger's second hobby to drumming always swayed Bernie's feelings, but never long enough to get him out of her head entirely. He was poison, but all Bernie wanted to do was drink it, even though she knew she'd get hurt. "Look, I can't tell you what to do, but as your favourite person I feel obliged to let you know that he's a toxic lover. Just ask any one of his many girlfriends. Sorry, I meant conquests. Maybe they'd make it to the girlfriend-boyfriend stage if he bothered to call any of them the next morning."

"I am very aware, Brian. I don't have feelings for him, but I have my moments, okay?" Thankfully, only Bernie knew that she was lying. Yes, she did still hate him with a fiery passion, but another perspective had been opened to her when Roger had cared for her so lovingly during her time of pain. Despite his irritating attitude and promiscuity, Bernie thought he had a certain way about him that was difficult to ignore. Perhaps it was his hair after all, because as she delved around in her thoughts, she could barely concoct one nice thing to say about him.

"For some weird reason, I seriously don't believe you. But I'll let it slide beings as you're having Holden and knee-healing troubles." Brian counteracted.

"Thanks, Brian."

"Mark my words Bernie, I can tell you haven't quite figured it out in your head yet, so if he so much as lays a finger on y-"

"Yes, yes, I know, you'll kick him out of the band." Bernie rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless.

"Woah, don't get ahead of yourself Bernie, we need our drummer. I was just gunna say I'd beat the living daylights out of him, as long as he can still play, that is." Laughter echoed down the line from both friends at Brian's odd sense of humour.

"Look, I really have to go now, time waster." Between the pair of them, insults were taken on the chin, not meant literally as the only thing that was stopping them from being siblings was their blood.

"Okay, okay, bye arsehole. Be careful, alright?"

"Yes, Brian. Bye now." And with that, the line went dead and Bernie made her way to the bathroom slower than she would have liked.

What she didn't hear over the sound of the shower whirring, washing away the day, was the sound of somebody pounding with irregular bangs of their fist at the door, as though drunk...

꧁ Aᴜᴛʜᴏʀ's Nᴏᴛᴇ: ꧂
𝐻𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑜! 𝑇ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑖𝑠 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑎 𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒 𝑢𝑝𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑠𝑎𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑏𝑒 𝑝𝑢𝑏𝑙𝑖𝑠ℎ𝑒𝑑 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦 𝑆𝑎𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑑𝑎𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑐𝑐𝑎𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦 𝑊𝑒𝑑𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑑𝑎𝑦.
𝐴𝑙𝑠𝑜, 𝐼'𝑚 𝑝𝑢𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑝𝑢𝑏𝑙𝑖𝑠ℎ𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑒𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑓 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑖𝑡𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑐𝑠 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑟𝑒𝑐𝑜𝑟𝑑.
𝑆𝑒𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑖𝑛 𝑓𝑢𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑒 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠 <3

30/11/22