(A/N: I know you hate Ghost right now because he's being a dick, But this chapter is going to explain his back ground story, and it's really fucking sad. It's from his point of view and it will make you understand why he is the way he is.)
*Ghost's Third Person Point of View*
He told her he didn't know how to do this at the lake. But she didn't listen. She wouldn't listen. And he thinks it's her fault.
The only relationship he's ever had didn't last very long, and it was over decade ago, before he became who he is today...
He was a kid, he didn't know what love is. He still had a sense of innocence in him then, innocence that can't be found in him today.
Ghost doesn't trust anyone, he can't trust anyone enough to tell them about his history. And sadly, one of them being Y/n. As much as he tries, he doesn't know how.
Simon worked as an apprentice butcher, when he saw the 9/11 attacks he decided to join the British military, and later became a member of the Special Air Service.
He came home later on, but couldn't to return to the military because he had to fix his broken family. His father was cheating on his mother, and Tommy, his brother, became a drug addict. Simon managed to help Tommy break from his drug addiction, and he kicked his father out of their home.
He later was shipped out on a mission to stop a Mexican drug dealer, but it went south and he was held hostage... and was gruesomely tortured. Which brought back all of the trauma from his youth. His brother, Tommy, used to paint a skull face on himself and scare Simon in the middle of the night.
And the man who tortured him used it as a weapon. He forced him to look at gruesome skulls for hours, days even. That man wanted to bring back those awful memories of his father forcing Simon to laugh at dead corpses, whom his father killed.
Simon was then buried alive, and left for dead.
But he survived and escaped.
Once the men that held him captive found out he escaped, they murdered his family and framed him for it.
But the sick part about this, was that he didn't even care that they were killed.
He later was approached by a man who asked him to join Task Force 141, and now he is who he is.
A traumatized, shell of a man.
He wishes her could tell Y/n about his past, but once she finds out the inhumane things he did, she will never look at him the same.
He doesn't even look at himself the same.
Now he hides behind a skull mask because it brings him comfort. It's easier killing people with it on, it gives him power. And he doesn't know why refuses to let go of the trauma of his past.
That's why he doesn't like it when people talk about his mask or his face, like that one time he yelled at Y/n for making a joke about it when they first met.
As much as he wants to became a better man for her, he doesn't know how to change.
He doesn't deserve her.
He thinks he's a monster.
A merciless monster who enjoys inflicting pain, and enjoys it when others inflict pain on him.
A sick, Masochistic Lion.
He doesn't understand why she loves him, how could a women like her love a killer like him? How is she not afraid? A man who didn't blink an eye when his family was murdered.
He doesn't know if he regrets upsetting her in the debriefing room, he thinks he did the right thing. And that its the best for her.
He's given her so many reasons to hate him, but she wouldn't budge. And he doesn't understand why.
He wishes he could tell her this, but he can't. He hopes she hates him now, he doesn't realize how heartbroken she is, and he's not sorry for his actions. Which ultimately proves how selfish he is.
But fuck, he can't be selfish with her. He doesn't like how she makes him feel, it feels foreign. He doesn't like who he is when he's with her, he feels weak. And love makes you weak.
_______________________________
I miss him.
I miss him so much.
I haven't heard a word from him in a month, i began using work as a distraction. But it didn't work.
Holy shit bitch, you're such a simp.
Do you want to hear the most fucked up part out of all of this?
I miss the sex. I have constant flashbacks of that night, wishing we could be doing that again right now.
Horny bitch.
But this isn't the end, i will see him again. Whether he likes it or not, this isn't over. I made so much progress with him, and i refuse to let that progress go. I haven't been able to sleep lately, mostly sleepless nights and a lot of Grey's Anatomy.
My phone suddenly rings, 'Johnny' it reads, it's 4 a.m. Why is he calling me at this hour?
"Hello?"
"Hey Y/n, how are you doing?" Something is wrong, i can hear it in his voice.
"What's wrong?" I sat up in bed. "What happened?" Fuck. Is it Simon?
"Um, how fast can you pack a bag?" He asked me, his voice still sounding off.
"I don't know like 10 minutes, why?"
"Okay i've booked a flight to Russia for you, it leaves 11 a.m..."
Oh no. Please tell me it's not what i think it is.
"Why?" my voice cracked.
"....Simons in a coma."
YOU ARE READING
The Ghosts Are Real (Simon Riley x Reader)
Fanfiction"Ghost and Y/n, taking over Russia." "You're out of your mind, you know that?" Ghost, 𝑶𝒏𝒄𝒆 a heartless, merciless man. A man who's name alone scares even the most powerful men. But has his heart truly softened for Y/n? Sequel to "You Cant Ki...
