NO STRINGS ATTACHED #Jiminfanfic (COMPLETED)

CHAPTER 16.

Ember pov:

"You are being so unfair! Mommy, please!"

Leia burst into tears and it was a struggle, a real fucking struggle, not to cry with her.

"I'm sorry sweetie, but we can't go tomorrow."

"That's what you said last time, too! I haven't seen Mr. Mike or Jimin or Ms. Lini forever and Jimin said we were gonna learn part of the puppet song and he said learning new songs is important to get better and ... and..."

"I'm sorry, Leia."

She wailed, a heart-wrenching cry of pure misery, and ran to her room. It was only when she got there that I let out the breath I'd been holding, along with a small amount of tears.

Being a mom was the hardest thing I'd ever done. It was harder than raising Namjoon. It was harder than having shitty parents who didn't feed you enough and didn't buy you school supplies. It was harder than walking to your best friend's house after not seeing him for three days, knocking on the door, and having a strange woman answer and tell you that Eddie wasn't ever going to be able to play again.

And those days were the hardest days of motherhood I'd experienced.

Leia lashed out at me. I didn't blame her. She was angry, upset, and discovering the crushing realization that life isn't fair. How could I blame her for being upset as her childish sense of justice was questioned and destroyed? She wasn't wrong: it wasn't fair, it didn't make sense, and I was kind of a poopy-headed meanie.

Although, I'd still sent her to her room after she called me the last one. It wasn't fair, either, but she wasn't allowed to talk to people like that.

I could hear Leia sobbing in her room from where I stood in the kitchen. After taking a moment to compose myself, wiping my own tears off my face, and putting my "mom" face back on, I went to her room.

"Sweetie?"

She sniffed loudly, her face buried in her pillow.

"Leia, honey. I know this isn't fair. I'm sad, too."

She sniffed again, a bit less dramatically, and turned her head so she could look at me with one eye.

"You are?"

I nodded and sat on the edge of her bed.

"I'll call ji-uh. I'll call the studio again tomorrow and we'll ... we'll see. Maybe Uncle Namjoon can come over instead and help you learn some new songs."

She sniffed again, wiping her face with the pillowcase before sitting up.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you, Mommy," she said. "I didn't know you were sad, too."

I had to blink very rapidly and stare up at the ceiling as she hugged me.

She was practicing her guitar a few minutes later, quiet strumming as I gently closed her bedroom door and went back to the kitchen. I picked up my phone and scrolled back through the messages.

I'm sorry. I didn't know. Can we talk?

Ok, if you don't want to talk, that's fine. Can you just let me know you're ok?

Should I bring Leia for her lesson tonight or no?

Called Lini, she just said you're not there. jimin, just tell me if you're okay. I'm worried.

It's been four days. Are you even fucking alive?

You asked me to keep bringing Leia for lessons but I can't do that if you're not going to be there. I need you to let me know.

Ok, so we're communicating through Lini now? Thanks a fucking lot.

I'm sorry. I was mad when I sent that. There's no real guideline for how to deal with shit like this. I'm not going to beg but I'd really like to talk about this.

Please.

Sighing, I typed a final message to him.

Lini called. I'm not bringing Leia tomorrow night. Sorry.

I wasn't expecting a reply, and didn't get one. Instead, I sent a message to Jimmy.

Will you help Leia learn some new songs?

Yeah, I guess ... something wrong with Jimin showing her?

Don't want to talk about it. Come over tomorrow night. I'll make spaghetti.

I busied myself after that. I cleaned the kitchen, made dinner, cleaned the kitchen again. Leia was sullen, a stoic sense of acceptance and disappointment in her innocent eyes.

"Can Baylee come over?" she asked when we were done eating.

"If Kelsie says she can, sure. I'll send her a message."

Of course Kelsie said yes. She was over before I had even finished cleaning the kitchen. Even Baylee seemed to be affected by the sadness that permeated my house. She said her usual cheerful greeting to me, then quietly walked to Kelsie's bedroom.

"How are you doing?" Kelsie asked. She picked up a dish towel and started drying the dishes I'd stacked in the sink.

"You don't have to do that."

"Whatever." She dried a plate and slid it into the cupboard. "Answer my question."

I stared at the dish I was scrubbing.

"Okay," I said after a moment's thought. "I talked to Lini. I'm not bringing Leia for any more lessons."

"What the fuck? Really? Has he messaged you yet?"

"No."

"After all that, he doesn't even have the decency to-"

"Don't, Kels. I'm not pissed."

She fell silent.

"Lini said he's been having a rough time. He almost started drinking again."

"Shit."

"Like, bought a bunch of alcohol and almost ... Don't tell anyone. I mean, Lini told me but I don't know if-"

"Yeah, yeah. Cross my heart, all that stuff. So he's, uh ... relapsing? Is that what's it called?"

I shrugged. "I feel awful."

"It's not your fault."

"I know it's not. I still feel bad for him."
"So you think it's over? Like, whatever the two of you had?"

"I guess so. He doesn't seem ... you know. I don't blame him. How do you get past that?"

"But you still wanted it to go somewhere." It wasn't a question. "You still do want it to go somewhere, don't you?"

When I didn't respond, she put the dishtowel down, wrapped her arms around my shoulders, and let me cry.

Two weeks went by. Namjoo started coming over regularly, helping Leia with new songs. She still asked about her lessons, still cried when I said we weren't going to the studio. She would make Namjoon promise that he'd tell Mr. Mike hello from her, and Namjoon always came back the next day saying that Mr. Mike said hello back.

She asked him to say hello to Jimin as well. I didn't listen to see if Jimin had also said hello back.

Namjoon was in the living room with Leia when jimin finally texted me.

Can u tell me how u knew him?

_________

𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜.

𝙋𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙫𝙤𝙩𝙚.

Ｓａｒａｎｇｈａｅ💜