Life Sucks and Then You Die (boyxboy)

Not Just A Dream

For anyone who doesn't know, I started writing this story quite a few years ago and am finally getting back to it now. I have been editing/rewriting the old chapters and plan to continue where I left off soon. I really hope you guys like it and please be sure to vote and comment. Your opinions matter to me. Thanks.

***TRIGGER WARNING***
Brief mention of self-harm

ETHAN'S POV:

I'm so small. I am so extremely small. I'm crouched in the corner of the room, cowering. And there he is, my step-father, seeming like a giant before me. And he is. He's ten feet tall and I'm barely a foot. He snaps his belt and the sound, along with his harsh words, repeatedly echo around the room. The words he says are seen before me in sharp, black print, floating around my head. "Haven't I told you enough?" He speaks, loudly and harshly, the way he always does. "Why would he want to be with someone so weak?" he sneers, and I'm sobbing, looking down at my hands. They shatter and I watch as the rest of my body does the same.

I wake up sobbing, not knowing I'd been crying in my sleep. I look around and hold my breath for a second. This isn't my room. Where am I? After a few seconds, my eyes adjust. I take in a deep breath and let out a shaky sigh. Greyson. I'm in his room. I'm in his bed. I had a nightmare. It takes me a second to realize that he's conscious. He turns to face me. "Huh?" He mumbles sleepily, slowly waking up. "Oh," I hear him say and he sits up quickly. He wraps his arms around me and holds me tightly. "Shh, baby. Shhh. It's okay," he speaks softly, rubbing circles on my lower back with one hand and running the other through my hair. "It was only a dream," he tells me, and I cry a little harder. Because it wasn't just a dream. It's my life.

He manages to comfort me enough that my sobs have become quiet sniffles. We're lying together on the bed and he's holding me around the waist from behind. I turn in his arms until I am facing him. "Hey," he speaks quietly and a small smile touches my face. "Hey," I whisper, barely audible. "Feeling any better?" He asks and I nod slightly. "Good," he says and kisses my forehead softly. "What time is it?" I ask, my voice cracking from crying just minutes ago. Greyson turns from me to check the clock and when he turns back, he says, "4:56." "Ughhh," I groan at the early hour. Greyson chuckles beside me. "I'm sorry," I tell him and his face becomes serious. "Don't be," he starts, "I'm more than happy to comfort you. I really care about you, Ethan," he says and I feel myself blush. "Thank you," I say in a tiny voice. He leans in so that his breath touches my ear and gives me chills. "You're welcome," he whispers.

GREYSON'S POV:

We cuddle for a while before falling asleep again in each other's arms. I wake up a few hours later to find Ethan still asleep beside me, snoring softly. I chuckle at his noises and sit up to look at him. As creepy as it may seem, I find myself staring at him, admiring how sweet he looks in his sleep. I love how calm and happy he seems. I continue watching for a moment before standing and walking to my dresser. I take out some clothes and go to my bathroom to change. I brush my teeth and hair and decide on just throwing a beanie over my head, rather than taking the time and effort to straighten it. I walk into my room and look at the clock. It reads 11:06am. I decide that it's late enough to wake him up. I climb onto my bed and crawl over to him. I run a hand through his hair and lean forward to kiss him softly. I feel his lips twitch in confusion before he kisses back. I pull away, smiling. A sleepy grin appears on his face and I laugh. "Good morning, beautiful," I say and his small grin becomes a smile. "Morning," he mumbles and pulls me down so I'm laying fully on top of him. I laugh. "It's time to get up, baby. It's just after eleven," I tell him. He wraps his arms around me and nuzzles his head into my neck. "Do I have to?" He grumbles into my shoulder and I chuckle. "Yes," I say, sitting up and getting off of him.

Ethan grumbles in protest, but slowly gets out of bed. I walk to my dresser and pull out some sweatpants and a T-shirt. I walk into my bathroom and pull an new toothbrush out of a drawer. I take my hairbrush off a shelf and walk back into my room to hand all the items to Ethan. He thanks me quietly and walks into the bathroom, still seeming sleepy. I make my bed while I wait for him. I'm straightening up my bedside table when I hear the bathroom door open. I turn at Ethan's voice. "Where should I put these?" He asks, referring to the dirty clothes in his arms. I hardly hear the question as I involuntarily gasp at the image before me. The sweatpants I gave him are a bit too big and hang low on his hips, slightly revealing the start of his v-line. The T-shirt reveals his arms, so often hidden in sweatshirts, and shows off his upper body. I shake my head and hope he doesn't notice. "Um... Uh..." I slowly process that he asked me a question. "Over there," I say, pointing to a hamper in the corner of the room.

After eating breakfast, Ethan tells me he can stay for a while and my parents and Nate aren't home, so we just go back up to my room. Ethan had put his sweatshirt back on almost immediately after changing earlier, even though it wasn't cold. We lay on my bed, just talking, and I'm just so incredibly happy to be with the beautiful boy laying beside me. We're laughing and occasionally kissing and eventually it becomes more kissing than anything else. I end up with my legs straddled on either side of his waist, just making out with him and kissing a line down his neck, earning giggles and eventually tiny moans. His hands roam my chest and mine rub his arms. Eventually I entwine my fingers in his and raise his arms above his head, pinning them there by his wrists.

ETHAN'S POV:

Greyson's lips crash down on mine and his hands are rubbing my upper arms, feeling the small amount of muscle that's there. He begins kissing my neck and I let out a quiet sound that I didn't even know I was capable of making. I hear Greyson chuckle and he continues kissing my neck, moving his hands to hold both of mine. He pulls my arms above my head and holds my wrists to restrain my arms. I wince slightly and he lets go and quickly sits up. "I'm sorry. Did I make you uncomfortable? Did I do something wrong? I'm sorry," Greyson sputters, starting to climb off my body. I place my hands on his knees to keep him in place and his eyes meet mine. "It's okay," I assure him. "You didn't do anything wrong. I was actually enjoying myself quite a bit," I tell him, blushing. He smiles back and replies coolly, "Well in that case, where were we?"

He goes back to kissing me before stopping himself and pulling away with a confused look on his face. "But then... Why 'd you wince?" I frown, not knowing what to do. "Um... I didn't?" I say, more like a question, knowing he's going to figure it out. "Come on, E. What's wrong?" He asks me, placing his hands in mine. "Nothing, it's nothing," I tell him, unable to meet his eyes. "Baby," he whispers, causing my whole body to feel like jello and making me meet his eyes. "Tell me. Please," he says in a caring voice. I sigh. "Okay," I give up, pushing his chest lightly, signaling him to get off of me. My feet hang over the side of the bed and he is sitting beside me with an expectant look on his face. He takes one of my hands in his and speaks softly, "Baby, whatever it is, you can tell me." I look at Greyson, knowing I trust him more than anyone else in the world besides my mom. I give him a nervous smile and my eyes go back and forth between my sleeve-covered wrist and Greyson's face. He holds my gaze before giving me an understanding look and letting go of my hand. He takes in a sharp breath and places a gentle hand on my sleeve. His eyes meet mine, looking for consent, and I nod my head, my lips in a tight line.

He slowly pulls my sleeve up to my elbow before taking my hand in his once more. He turns my arm over so that my bare wrist is visible and I hear him quietly gasp. "Oh, honey," he whispers sadly, looking up to meet my guilty face. The look on his face breaks my heart and my eyes begin to water slightly. "Come here," he tells me softly, pulling my body into his warm embrace. I love the feeling of his strong arms around me, making me feel safe. After a few long minutes of holding me in his arms, Greyson pulls away and puts his hands on my shoulders. "Hey," he says quietly, causing my eyes to meet his. "This is just a thing, okay?" He says, giving me a comforting look. "This is just a thing and we can get through it. You're not alone. You know that, don't you?" I can't help but smile a little and reply, "I do now." "Good," he says, smiling lightly. He pulls me into his chest and holds me tightly. I feel him place his head on my own and he mumbles quietly, "I've got you."

Hey! How are you guys feeling about the story so far? Where do you want it to go? Please vote and comment. Your opinions are really important to me.

Stay hydrated,
A.J.