Painkiller|ws

Chapter 16

"You look wow" Wonwoo wasted no time showering Joshua with compliments as he walked into the room. "So what are we doing? Straight to bed or?" Wonwoo smirked as he played with the hem of Joshua's oversized sweater that was swallowing him up.

"I have such a beautiful boyfriend" Wonwoo admired, being annoying enough to pull the sweater off Joshua's shoulder. "Remember when I did this the first time we met?" Wonwoo stepped closer before kissing Joshua's exposed shoulder, his lips lingering for a moment too long.

"I wanted to do this then, too" Wonwoo's hands slipped inside Joshua's sweater as his lips latched onto his skin. Then, as if something clicked in Joshua, he pulled back like he got burned. "I-I have to say something later" Wonwoo's face turned to a worried one instantly when he heard the panic in Joshua's voice.

"Sweetheart, what is it?" Joshua refused to open up until the night was so far gone. He laced his fingers with Wonwoo's before taking him outside and heading into the common room like they always do this time of the night.

"You didn't..." Wonwoo's mouth hung open at what Joshua had done. Blankets and snacks with a bunch of Joshua's plushies scattered around. "It's m-messy. I didn't have- I didn't have time" Wonwoo just laughed in utter adoration before squishing Joshua's face together and placing a kiss on his lips.

"It's perfect. I'll help you clean up after" Wonwoo was the one pulling now, dragging Joshua down into the middle of the couch before sitting him down on his lap. "Jeonghan gave me the tv code...we can wa-watch a movie, maybe?" Wonwoo had already grabbed the remote by the time Joshua finished the sentence, letting him put down the code and go to check the movies.

"They need to do movie nights more often, and they keep these gems from us" Joshua was undeniably aware of Wonwoo's arm snaking around his waist to rest there like that's where it belonged. "We should watch dirty dancing? Or we can watch minions- it's the same, really" Joshua smiled as he rested his head on Wonwoo's shoulder.

"Won..." Wonwoo hummed at the mention of his name. "I need to tell you something" Wonwoo's rapid button pressing stopped before his entire attention was given to Joshua. "I want to tell you what happened with me for me to....fo-for me to be like this..." Wonwoo's expression morphed into a serious one as both his hands wrapped around Joshua's waist protectively.

"Take your time. I don't need you to force yourself" Joshua was almost close to crying, but the words that left Wonwoo's mouth only motivated him to let a tear fall down his cheeks. "I wasn't like this at all. I was just stupid...I wa-was so stupid" Joshua's breath hitched before he continued. All he could hope was Wonwoo wouldn't be disgusted by him.

~

"Hey josh, stay" Joshua laughed at the way Johnny pulled him back, not letting him walk towards his friends calling out to him. "I have class. What do you mean by stay?" Joshua had a playful smirk on his lips as Johnny leaned down to kiss him. He knew everyone was going crazy behind them.

"Stop with the PDA" Joshua shook his head as he went to walk away again but got pulled back against Johnny's chest. "One more" Joshua rolled his eyes before Johnny took him by surprise and dipped him before kissing him. This time the cheers were loud. "I love you, Joshua Hong" Joshua giggled as he turned his head to see his friends taking videos.

"I love you too, Johnny Suh" Johnny bent down to rub his nose against Joshua. "Go to class then. I'll drive you around in my car after school ends" Joshua's face lit up, he was always very enthusiastic about car rides, and he loved being with Johnny in his car at night.

"Okay" Joshua scrunched his nose in joy as Johnny kissed his forehead one last time before walking backwards until he had no choice but to turn. "You look sexy" Johnny shouted, and Joshua's face turned red in embarrassment as he walked to his friends, who relentlessly teased him.

Classes dragged out, and the thoughts of the drive stuck in Joshua's head. He could only hope for what would come of it. Their first time being in a car seemed romantic, like in those old movies. Joshua noticed that he was smiling to himself throughout the day until he walked outside to see Johnny leaning up against his black Porsche (2 baddies, 1 Porsche baby), looking as handsome as ever.

"You ready to go, babes?" Joshua's heart fluttered as Johnny held the car door open for him before running to the other side and getting in. "Let's go" Joshua has no idea that one drive would change his life forever.

Joshua wasn't wrong about his assumption. He wasn't the biggest fan of having his first time in a car, but he was with Johnny, and that's all that mattered. He was happy that day when he went to bed, but he had no idea what was to come the day after.

"Josh! Did you see it yet?" Joshua's eyebrows scrunched in confusion as his friend Jennie ran up to him with her phone the moment he stepped into school. "What?" She had an apologetic look on her face as she passed him her phone.

"He's such an asshole" Joshua's hand flew to his mouth in dread as he stared back at the video of himself that he knew for a fact he didn't consent to be taken, let alone spread across the school.

"Jennie, I-" Joshua looked at the phone again, his face clearly on the camera as Johnny moved inside him. His face wasn't clear, but Joshua's was, making him feel all sorts of emotions. Angry, sad, embarrassed, violated, but mainly weak. Joshua felt so weak. He turned his head away before giving the phone to Jennie.

"Babe, I swear I just sent it to a friend. I didn't know" Joshua felt his throat dry as Johnny came up to them. "Y-You send it to a...you send it to a friend?" Joshua faltered under Johnny's gaze. He was clearly lying, but the lie was just as bad. "You looked so hot" Johnny went to touch Joshua, and he flinched back.

"Do-Don't touch me" Joshua was visibly shaking as Jennie held him up. "How dare you take a video of him without his consent?" Jennie spoke up for him, which he was thankful for. "Without consent? Oh, josh wanted it, didn't you? I remember he suggested it" Joshua's mouth hung agape as he listened to the person he loved.

"When did I-" Johnny chuckled as he turned his attention from Jennie to Joshua. "Don't act innocent now. You wanted to" Joshua tried to speak back, but he physically couldn't. Suddenly he was aware of everyone staring at him. Joshua staggered back, suddenly feeling suffocated in the empty hall.

That's when it started, refusing to leave his house and the stuttering. The awful fucking stutter. He was terrified of people. He was terrified to go out. It took his parents a while to figure out it was a psychiatrist they needed to consult and not a physician.

Knowing it was better for Joshua to stay away from Los Angeles, they admitted him to a hospital in South Korea where he still had some family to rely on. That's where Joshua had been living for the past few years of his life. Absolutely miserable, that is until Jeon Wonwoo happened.

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