Nothing Without You

XIII: Thorns Grew from our Tears

Then | Christian

She looked so beautiful, standing there in all her bright, glory, angelic features. I couldn't help but stare at her from a mile away. Adelaide was a force to be reckoned with, and I was reckoning in a thousand different ways. Her dress sewn to perfection and the way she smiled at me from across the room made me feel like a worthy boy.

The smile disappeared when I saw who was next to her.

Abdullah Qureshi.

He asked Adelaide out to the dance. Which was fine, really. But I found it hypocritical since he preached about not hanging out with girls the other day because his religion didn't allow it. Yeah, I get it, people have their own views and opinions and actions. I was no one to judge.

But when my girl was at this dance with him, everything mattered.

High school was already a mess with everyone exploring themselves with one another and rebelliousness. Abdullah was the guy girls needed to stay away from if they didn't want to find themselves at the bottom of a ditch, somewhere in the forest.

"Is there something on your mind, Chris?" I forgot I brought someone as a date to this stupid dance too. Lauren stood beside me. She was beautiful in her own way, I guess. But I wasn't romantically attracted to her. She was a friend and a great football player. Plus, I liked her company. Although, there were times when it felt like she really did like me in another way.

I also hated the fact that she called me Chris, but whatever.

"Nah, I'm vibing." I took the punch from her offering hand. "Why?"

"You look like you'd rather be at home or with someone else right now," she tucked a strand of her hair behind her ears. Suddenly looking shy. "I always assumed you liked Adelaide, honestly, I think everyone did. You never left her side ever since she first moved here. Which is why I'm surprised you asked me to the dance."

I opened my mouth to speak, to clarify that I only asked her as friends, but she continued to talk, leaving no room for me to reply.

"I've kept this to myself for a while. I'm a little scared to confess this but," her eyes widened slightly in a doe-eyed effect. Oh. I knew exactly where this was going. "I like you, Christian. Not as friends, but as... you know." She chuckled nervously and looked away.

In another world, in another life, I could've liked Lauren. She was smart, tall, and everything any boy looked for in a girl. But my heart wasn't set upon her. It didn't beat once when she was near. I felt alive with Adelaide; it was weird. I was thinking about her when Lauren was standing with her heart laid out bare in her hands in front of me, but I couldn't help myself.

Meeting Adelaide was the day I was born and any moment I wasn't with her, I died.

"Look, Laur." Her shoulders slumped at the tone of my voice. I was being as gentle as I could with her. "You're an amazing girl, beautiful even. But I asked you to the dance as a close friend. I'm sorry but I don't have any feelings for you and I don't think I ever will."

Her lips slightly quivered. "Yeah, of course. No, it's fine." She blabbered, "I'm so stupid for doing this. Just forget everything I said." She turned around to walk away, but I grabbed her arm. "Hey," I said. "I wish I had your courage, really. I admire you a lot, Lauren."

"You shouldn't feel ashamed for your honesty, it's a power not a lot of people have."

She didn't meet my eyes, but she smiled. "I can't stay with you now, it'll be awkward."

"Awkward? Why?"

"Because I just told you I liked you and you rejected me, it's weird now."

"No, it's not. I care about that, I do. But we're friends before we're crush and crushee."

"Crush and crushee? No wonder you're failing English," she laughed, and I did too. "I'll go get us more punch."

As she walked away I looked around for Adelaide, but she was nowhere to be found.

Where the hell was she?

***

Author's Note [March 6, 2023]:

I'm feeling very apologetic for the late update, but university is honestly so hectic and stressful. I barely got the time to sit and edit/write. This is so short, but I wanted to share something with you before I posted a longer chapter on Wednesday (yes, this time I'm not lying). 

Have you had your first kiss? If yes, how old were you and what happened? (I'm nosy LOL). 

My answer: no... i have not... 

Anyways, see you soon. 

fingers crossed, 

izza