To say that Gerard was careful with me would be an understatement. Gerard, from the moment we admitted our mutual attraction, treated me like I could shatter at any moment.
Not that I minded. It was probably true- I was new to this. I wasn't at good at being with a boy in a relationship, I wasn't good at relationships, period. I was still sorting out my own emotions, so dealing with someone else's wasn't exactly on the top of my list right now.
What had made me admit that I liked him, I still can't figure out. I don't know when it happened, either. I'd never seen Gerard as a romantic interest, but I'd also never put him off limits to myself in that way. Gerard to me had never been just a friend, but I had never quite allowed myself to look at him as something more, either.
Until now.
We sat in silence for a moment, both of us thinking about our conversation.
"So," Gerard said. "I guess..."
"I guess... We're..."
"Um."
We blinked at each other and then both laughed for a few moments, breaking the tension.
"We're at an agreement here?" Gerard asked quietly.
"Agreement?"
"That we're, uh... How do people put it nowadays? 'An item?'"
I laughed.
"Yeah, I think that's what people are calling it."
"So..."
"I guess we're... Together?"
Gerard smiled that small, half-smile that made me smile, too. "Yeah, there's a good word to describe us. 'Together.'"
His hand squeezed mine.
"What do you want to tell your mom?" I asked. "I mean, I'm over here everyday, anyways, so..."
He shrugged. "Let's not say anything. If she figures it out, she figures it out."
"And Mikey...?"
"Same for him."
I nodded. "I don't... I don't think I want to tell my mom. Not yet. Not now."
"Okay, that's fine. I understand... This is just beginning, we have all the time in the world."
We both went quiet again. Gerard leaned towards me, pressing his lips quickly to my cheek.
I felt the blush rise up in my cheeks. "Gerard..."
He grinned. "Are you going to blush every time I do that?"
"Probably."
"Then expect it to happen a lot more often."
He did it again, lips lingering just a second too long.
Just then Gerard's mom called from the kitchen, distracting us both. "Boys!" she yelled. "Food is ready!"
We stood up and made our way to the door, fingers still twined together.
We ate dinner like that, too, our fingers laced beneath the table. Every few minutes Gerard would send me a look that reminded me that it was all okay.
I just squeezed his fingers and smiled.
I was scared, but I wanted this. I really did. The more I thought about Gerard and our friendship the less weird a relationship with him seemed.
---
After dinner, we went out and sat behind Gerard's house, setting a blanket over the grass. Gerard sat up against the house, legs stretched out, and I laid out on the blanket, resting my head near his hip.
