Secret Son / Bang Chan

Part 15

Grey and I don't go to Chan's place for a couple of days and I was happy about it. There had been enough emotional turmoil without those visits.

After two days, he does invite us over, and I feel too guilty to refuse him. I had spent the entire night before tossing and turning in my bed, thinking about everything that had happened and not getting any closer to any answers.

Felix loves me.
That piece of information was still so foreign, even though I knew it shouldn't be. I was aware that he cared about me, that he loves Grey, but to hear him say he loves me in a romantic sense.... 

One would have to be an idiot to not see that Lee Felix was damn near perfect.
It's not only his appearance (although that is near perfect, too), it's his personality: he's trustworthy, he's fun, he's kind-hearted, he's witty, he's intelligent, and he's wise. 

Chan is not wise in the slightest.
Chan can be dumb at times, he's insecure and nervous, he  is sometimes still stuck in the past when he was unsure of his self-image, and he still had a lot of growing up to do.

And yet...

Even with the perfect man being available to me, both emotionally and physically, I was still thinking of Chan. 
Which is what worried me.
Chan was not only sorely lacking in many ways, but he was also taken, and the two of us were not in high school anymore where arrangements and relationships could be changed every day. Both of us were meant to start thinking about being more serious with someone.

And that someone could be Lee Felix for me.
Felix is better than Chan in every way possible on paper. I am just an idiot who's still stuck on this man, possibly because I never truly got over him. 

The next day was horrible for me. Grey is extremely energetic and I was tired and felt a wave of annoyance incoming. Not wanting to risk upsetting my blameless child, I play cartoons for him and tell him that I'll be cleaning the kitchen.

And clean the kitchen I do.
The vigorous scrubbing and washing of every surface is calming and allows me to empty my mind, the rhythmic movements lulled me into a semi-focused state when the door bell rings. 

I made my way to the door and to my suprise see Hwang Yeji standing there.

"Hello Y/N!"

She says with her signature small smile that when I first met her, I thought was insincere until I learned that Yeji doesn't usually doesn't display emotions very animatedly. Jisung stands next to her and presses his finger to his lips.

"Momma, who's there?"

Jisung crept up behind Grey, who was still watching cartoons, he pressed his hands to Grey's eyes and he squeals in delight:

"CHANNIE?!"

Jisung clicks his tongue in mock offense.

"Uhhh, Uncle Felix?"

"Close," Jisung murmured and Grey turned and wiggled out of his hold to nearly climb onto the back of the couch:

"Oh, Uncle Jisung."  He said blankly, he then looked past Jisung and immediately brightened up.

"AUNT YEJI!"  He squealed. Yeji quickly ran to him and pushed her fiancé out of the way to pick up Grey. Yeji walked around the couch and sits down with Grey in her lap. 

"Now, why do you get so excited to see Aunt Yeji and not your Uncle Jisung?" Jisung fakes hurt and dramatically puts his hand over his heart like he had been wounded. 

"Aunt Yeji didn't make my momma cry!" Grey pouts and shoots Jisung a glare. I had to suppress my laughter at my son's protectiveness on my behalf. Jisung looked at me for help as Yeji laughed.

"Grey, Uncle Jisung didn't mean to make me cry."

I tried to reason with him on it but he didn't want to accept it.

"Well, maybe I would like him more if he brought me presents too."

"Grey." I mildly scold but Grey puts a finger to his chin like he was pretending to think. This was new for him to act like this. 

"Everyone always bring me presents and I love them a lot, and Uncle Jisung wants me to love him..."  

"Woah." Yeji said quietly from the couch:

"This kid is getting smarter every day." She smirks and I cast her a threatening glare, to which she only giggles.

"Grey that isn't very nice. You shouldn't evaluate people based on things they do or don't give you." 

"But momma, Uncle Felix and Channie always ask me if I like their presents and if they're the best presents!" 

My features must've darkened immediately because before I can say anything, Jisung chuckles weakly and takes Grey from Yeji.

"Grey, I forgot something in my car. Let's go get it shall we!"

"Okay, is it a present for me?" 

"Greyson."  I scold one more time with a cold tone, and this time Grey knows that I'm being serious and stops pressing the issue.

The door closed behind the two and I flop down next to Yeji on the couch:

"I can't fucking believe this."

"Yeah men are the worst huh."

"Seriously, are these two having some sort of pissing match?" 

"Well..." Yeji says in an evil tone, that means she about to absolutely roast someone to ashes:

"Felix has been holding it in for years now, his proverbial bladder must be close to bursting by now."

I can't help but to burst out laughing.

"Can we please not turn this into a long running pee joke?" 

"That depends on how amusing I deem this to potentially be." 

"Yeji, you don't seem surprised by this development at all."

"Y/N, nobody is surprised. Honestly the only surprise is that he didn't make a move on you sooner. Felix has been crushing on you since the 7th grade but when you got with Chan the first time he stepped back. So now that the Aussie beefcake is back in the picture, I suspect he won't wait too long pounce." 

"I feel like an idiot for now seeing it. All the signs were there I just didn't read them." 

"Oh they definitely were. That kid has been on you like an American teenage boy on Megan Fox in 2009. I love you but sometimes you're really oblivious to the obvious." 

Her analogy made me cringe:

"Yeah, it makes sense why Chan was always so jealous back then and even now."

Yeji suddenly interrupted me and put her hand on my knee, "which one do you want to fuck more?"

"Excuse me, what?!"