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─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
❝ why do you care...❞
─── „I'LL SEE YOU ALL AT THE RE-AUDITIONS." helen said enthusiastically, trying to leave the classroom.
the class however started to talk all over each other in disbelief. „What do you mean re-audition?" robbie asked confused.
„to stay in this school." helen explained. „but we already did that, that's why we're here." cat said with big eyes.
niki put his head back and sighed out loudly. he was really annoyed by every little thing the past few days. and he was still mad at beck.
and now this.
„what the fuck man.." he whispered with annoyance in his voice. after helen left the classroom with her assistant, everyone was shocked.
„who else is frightened of her?" sikowitz asked. everyone except jade and niki raised their hands.
„what an absolute load of horseshit." niki said after leaning next to andré's locker during break. „do you know what you will present already?" his friend asked.
„nope. too stressed to even think of that." the blonde answered. „man i'm so scared! what should i sing??" andré said with a shaking voice.
niki hated andré's self doubts. because he knows that he is awesome and extremely talented but always acts like he's gonna fuck up.
it was really draining for niki because he doesn't think of himself as that talented. he in fact is a perfectionist and overanalyzes everything he does wrong.
„hey what's up?" niki heard from a too familiar voice. beck.
niki didn't respong but just rolled his eyes and went away. he didn't want to see or talk to beck.
xx
the whole hollywood arts was shaking the entire week. everybody was practicing and freaking out about the re-auditions.
everyone except niki.
he didn't even start to practice. to be completely honest, he haven't even chosen what he wants to present.
he was in his deep depression again where he doesn't care about anything. he doesn't feel anything during these times.
so what if he fucks up? then he'll gonna change schools. it's whatever. he isn't talented enough for this school anyways, he thought to himself.
it was lunch break and he was sitting on the ground of the blackbox theatre, rolling a cigarette for himself.
he thought he'd be completely alone, before someone opened the door. great.
„niki..?" beck asked confused. „what are you doing? the audition is tomorrow." he added, worriedly.
„so what?" niki responded dry, not even looking at beck. „so what? you haven't even started practicing and you sit here alone, rolling a cigarette even though you stopped smoking months ago."
„why do you care..." niki mumbled to himself, thinking that beck didn't understand him. he however, sat next to him, looking at him with his big brown eyes.
„what's going on? please tell me."
niki couldn't hold it anymore. „what's going on you ask?! i am fucking untalented! i don't belong in this school! and i don't even care about failing! i don't feel a fucking thing in fact! everyday is a fucking fight against myself, i'm sinking in this deep hole again and i can't do this!" he screamed while tearing up.
beck knew what he meant immediately. he knew about niki's depression and how it gets worse and better all the time.
he also knew, that when he starts sinking again, he needs a helping hand that pushes him up, or else he will lose himself again.
beck put his hand on niki's thigh, looking at him intensly. „niki. please believe me when i say that you are extremely talented. you deserve to be here and i am sorry for being such a fucking jerk lately. i am really sorry."
„but i don't want you to get kicked out. because this school wouldn't be the same without you."
niki looked at the ground, feeling his eyes getting watery. „why did you act like that lately?" niki asked carefully.
beck sighed. „i don't know if getting back together with jade was the right decision." niki could feel his heart beating faster at this sentence.
„what do you mean? i thought you two were so happy together?" beck shook his head. „yeah i thought that too. but now it feels like the wrong thing."
„so break up with her?"
★ ★ ★
a/n: omg guysss thanks for all the love this story gets it means a lot to me 🫶
i want to say in advance that this story is gonna end after 10 chapters!!! thats everything i planned on, but for now, enjoy this story 💘
