Nevermind [90s fic]

Chapter 17: The Right To Choose Your Consequences

"What's going through your head, Lolo?" asked Marilyn, reaching over the cold grey cafeteria table to hold her sister's forearm. "You look as sour as I feel."

"Huh?" Lauren checked in to her environment, becoming aware of her friends' curious eyes steadily on her and the typical commotion happening all around her. She shook her head and played with the unopened carton of chocolate milk, the other hand supporting her cheek as she slouched and sighed. "Nothing. Softball stuff."

"Really? Softball stuff?" Marilyn repeated back to her in a tone that alerted Lauren to how ridiculous it sounded. Sadness of that magnitude frozen on Lauren's ghostly face did not correlate to the trivial problems of the high school sport.

"What? Our season starts in three months and I kinda don't wanna play anymore. It's weighing heavy on me," Lauren defended irritably.

"I think I saw that coming," Julian added while going to town on the tater tots he saved from breakfast this morning.

"Shit. Really?" Marilyn's concern amplified. "Are you sure? Mom and Dad's gonna have a heart attack."

"I don't care, to be honest. Imagine having to be hospitalized because of my interests and my investment in them. Give me a fucking break," Lauren did a double-take when she spotted Karla returning to the cafeteria with Eli, looking as fresh as a daisy or like an actress in a beauty skincare commercial. Disgruntled, Lauren brought her purple hoodie over her head and lifted an arm to hide her face.

"Wow," Marilyn sat back in her chair, observing someone she hardly recognized in this moment. "I don't believe it."

"If you played the sport for fun instead, you wouldn't have the resentment that you have for it now," said Miles, chomping off a piece of rope taffy he shared with Marilyn. "I keep telling motherfuckers it's a waste of time and a breeding ground for the burden of other people's lame emotions and opinions. Fuck it; play only for fun and leave the seriousness out of it."

Marilyn hit him on the arm, frustrated with his take and approach to life when having to do with nurturing talent and making something out of it. "You're quite literally the best basketball player I know, sleeping on a full ride to any university with a great varsity team, and a ticket to the NBA. Just because you waste your gifts and sleep on your potential doesn't mean everyone else has to."

"Wowwww," he dragged out, offended but without any more words to say. "Thanks, Mare."

"Why is everybody so pissy today?" Julian huffed, temporarily breaking from his hill of tater tots dripping with an obscene amount of ketchup.

"Whatever, we'll talk more about this later," Marilyn quickly told her sister before turning to Julian. "I have the perfect remedy. After we pick up Danny from the doctor's, we should all go see about those skinheads that were picking on Miles yesterday. I know a couple of guys who would be thrilled to kick their ass with us—brass knuckles and all," she lit up as she then got into this one episode of the Sally Jessy Raphael show she had seen recently that ignited her desire to take down a skinhead or five.

Lauren tuned out of the conversation again. She glanced across the crowded cafeteria to the preps' table, her stomach turning and contracting when she watched Karla relax in her boyfriend's lap, swinging her legs as she played in his hair while chatting with Normani and Dinah sitting across from her. They haven't spoken since losing their virginities, and a couple of days have already passed since then. The stark difference between them was Lauren becoming more distant with Danny than she already was before putting out, and Karla becoming more attached to Eli as opposed to the carefree attitude she had about being around him or not. Everything about those two screamed "we had sex!" and Lauren couldn't bare the bodily tremors she suffered because of it. And everything about Karla...screamed that she didn't need her anymore...