love me until i love myself / l.s

22

Louis' birthday came by quickly and Harry couldn't sleep. He had his hands on his tummy and was staring at the ceiling. Something felt weird. He turned his head to see Louis asleep next to him and he realized that this man is thirty. Harry was seven whole years younger than him. It didn't feel weird, but it just felt like Louis was more experience than Harry and he treated him like a child.

He tried getting up quietly, his feet touching the cool wooden floor, when Louis' arm touched his shoulder softly.

''Are you okay?'' he mumbled and Harry turned his head, whispering a small 'yes'.

''Why are you getting up, then?'' he asked.

''I just can't fall asleep. It's 6AM anyways. Sleep.'' Harry said, putting on a pair of sweatpants and a T-Shirt. Louis sat up, turning on the small lamp on the nightstand and rubbed his eyes, sleepily.

''Aren't you comfortable in this bed? Why can't you sleep?'' he asked, worriedly.

''No, I am good. I just couldn't sleep. No big deal.'' Harry shook his head, trying to reassure Louis that everything was okay.

''Okay, fine. I won't insist, but you owe me some answers in the morning.'' Louis said, sternly, before turning the lamp off and let his head hit the pillow again.

Harry smiled a little at how cute Louis was being and he opened the door, shutting it quietly and slipped on his shoes. He was going to take a walk outside. Once he was at the living room, he noticed that everyone was awake, decorating the room and Harry looked at them confused. Everyone turned to look at him and they just all were staring at each other. Harry would laugh if he wasn't so confused.

''Why aren't you asleep?'' Jay asked, coming from the kitchen, wiping her hands in a towel.

''Um...I just couldn't sleep, so I was gonna take a walk. What are you guys doing up?''

''Oh, we are decorating the house for Louis' birthday. Big thirty and all.'' Dan said and they all nodded.

''I'm baking a cake, if you wanna help? Jay asked and Harry nodded, immediately, smiling a little, as he followed her to the kitchen.

''Louis didn't want to make a big deal out of his birthday this year, because he doesn't like the fact that he is turning thirty and he isn't really fond of the whole growing up thing. Never was, never will. Some things just don't change.'' Jay shook her head fondly at her son, who refused to grow up and Harry's smile grew wider.

He knew that deep down, beneath the fame and the money and the fake personality, Louis was literally a normal person. A childish one, but nonetheless, a nice, normal man.

''He's pretty childish sometimes.'' Harry chuckled, stirring the batter and Jay sighed. She didn't like this. Not the Harry part, 'cause he was an adorable, young man and she could see that he had good intentions. She didn't like how her son was acting. She didn't get it. She found out about their little 'arrangement' and it wasn't just cruel, but also unreasonable. In her mind, it literally made no sense. Why would Louis think that and how did he come up with it? This wasn't her son speaking and she did not know what the hell was going on between them, but she knew that someone would end up getting hurt.

Louis needed to come to his senses as soon as possible or all of this was gonna go down really fast.

*

''What time is it?'' Louis asked, sitting up on the bed and Harry smiled.

''It's ten.'' he informed him, as Louis stretched, humming.

''I overslept.'' he said, ready to reach for his laptop, that was in the nightstand, but Harry was quick to grab it and placed it on top of the dresser. Louis made a scoff and just glared at the younger man, who smirked.

''Give it back to me. I haven't checked my e-mails since yesterday.''

''You can make it one more day. You're not getting it back until after your birthday.'' Harry said and Louis closed his eyes, groaning. He wasn't going to fight with Harry tonight.

''Please dont remind me it's my birthday ever again. Thank you.'' Louis mumbled, getting up. Harry rolled his eyes and walked towards the older man.

''Birthdays should be celebrated. Thirty is a huge milestone.''

''Thirty is when all your problems begin. You can't drink too much, you can't eat grease, you can't do anything dangerous or fun, you can't go clubbing, your back hurts, your hair turns gray and you get a beer belly, before you even realize it. Thirty is old and I hate it! I want my twenties back.'' Louis whined, putting on a clean pair of sweatpants and a T-Shirt. Harry frowned at his words, and furrowed his eyebrows, thinking. Louis should have a big birthday party with the people he loves. Maybe that will make him like his birthday again.

''Thirties is a good time. You'll have fun. My mum loved her thirties.''

''I absolutely hate them!'' Louis said and Harry rolled his eyes, following him downstairs.

''Harry, what are you doing? Why are you-'' Louis said confused, when Harry was stepping in front of him in order to stop him from going downstairs.

''Oh no. They didn't plan a birthday party again.'' Louis said, looking down, where his whole family was blowing balloons and were wearing birthday caps, decorating the room, not having noticed the two men.

''Lou! Happy birthday, baby!'' Jay rushed towards her son and he smiled a little, letting the woman wrap him up in a warm hug.

''Thank you, mum. You know you didn't have to do that, though!'' Louis insisted and she just shook her head.

''My baby turns thirty only once.'' she said, clapping her hands in excitement and Louis nodded smiling. Harry knew it was a fake smile. Maybe Louis hated his birthday THAT much.