Strawberry Blonde // Solangelo High School AU

Part 15

"Hey, are you okay?"

Will sat down next to me, taking my hand.

I glanced at him, seeing his bright blonde hair shining in the midday sun. I look into his eyes, the soft concern that made me love him more. His lips were so smooth, not chapped at all. I don't know how he did it. It was freezing up here. My lips have cracked to the point where they bleed.

I shook my head, biting my lip, looking down at my feet.

What was I supposed to tell him? If i told him what i was really thinking about, he would probably think that since I wasn't sure what to do that i didn't want to be with him.

But that wasn't true. I loved him. He was all I ever wanted. I didn't want him to think otherwise.

But if I was having a problem making a decision did i really?

No, Nico, stop. Don't think like that.

"What's wrong?" He brushed my hair out of my eyes, lifting my chin up to look at him.

"Well-" I started when i noticed how his hair was still wet, "Strawberry Blonde, you're going to freeze."

"Huh? oh that?" He ran his fingers through his hair smiling slightly, "I'll be fine, just talk to me."

"No, you're going back inside, now," I took his hand, pulling him up and towards the ladder.

"I love you Neeks," he laughed, climbing down next to me.

I bit my lip again.

I don't know why that made me feel guilty. 

I love him. So why did i feel guilty?

"I love you to Will,"

Will took my hand, pulling me back into our dorm room.

"Now what's up Neeks?" He sat down on the couch, pulling me down next to him

"I- first, promise you won't be mad okay?" I picked at my lips nervously, causing them to bleed.

"First, stop doing that," he took my hand and pulled it away from my mouth, "and of course i won't be mad."

I hated those words. How could he know anything? For all he knew, i hated him!

But i didn't. And he knew that. I loved him. 

"Okay," I nodded, picking at my jeans with my free hand, "So you know how Jason was here?"

"Yeah," his fingers traced down my leg, making my face grow warm.

"Well, to make this short, he wants me to go live with him," I stared down at my feet, unable to meet his eyes.

I heard Will inhale sharply but i could tell he tried to hide it.

"And do you plan to?" He asked, his hands stopped tracing my leg.

"I don't know Will. If i do, I'll be safe. But if i go, I'll lose you. I don't know what to do. I don't want to leave you," I heard my voice slowly start to become quieter as i spoke.

"Nico," Will cupped his hand under my chin, turning my face up to meet his eyes, the warmth of his skin making my heart stop, "why would you think I would be mad about that?"

I loved that cute, sweet, look in his eyes. He made me want to kiss him and cuddle with him.

"I don't know," I shrugged, trying to keep tears from falling down my face.

"Hey, hey, shhh, it's okay," I felt his arms wrap around me, pulling me in. I closed my eyes, burying my head in his chest.

I don't know how long we sat there and i didn't care. In that moment, I don't know how I could feel safer anywhere, especially not with Jason.

Time seemed to stop at that moment. It felt like it was just me and Will. It felt like no one else was in the world. 

"Hey Nico, whatever you choose, I will love you either way," he whispered, his fingers slowly tracing through my hair.

"Why?" I asked, pulling away from him, tears streaking down my face, "why do you love me? What have i done to ever deserve that?"

"Nico, don't say that," Will shook his head, looking up, his eyes piercing into my soul.

"No, i want to know. What is it about me? Why me? You can have literally anyone in this school, why me?" I stood up, pacing around the room, "I don't deserve you!"

"Nico, you can't expect me to explain love to you," Will sighed, leaning forward, his elbows balanced on his knees.

"But what? What is it about me that you like? That anyone would like?"

My hands were shaking. Tears slipping down my face. These questions had been floating through my head for weeks and seemed to now be spilling out of my mouth.

"Fine, you want to know?" Will asked, standing up, "You're funny, you're like the only person here who actually understands sarcasm, you're cute, you're sweet in your own way even though you refuse to admit to it, your smile makes my heart stop, you just sitting there makes me want to kiss you and sometimes I don't even know why. Would you like me to go on? Because i can rant about everything great about you for hours,"

I crossed my arms, refusing to look up.

"Nico," his hand found his way to mine, " I love you. I don't know one hundred percent why but i do. And I'm never going to stop loving you. Never. There is nothing you can do to stop that."

I loved the smoothness of his voice, the calming sound filling my ears, making my heart slow back down to a more normal speed.

"You know what Will? I've made my choice," I whispered.

"Oh yeah?" 

I heard the fear leaking through his voice but he tried to hide it.

"I'm not going anywhere unless you are," I leaned in, my hands on his face.

He smiled, his arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me in.

I pressed my lips against his, and thought back to the safety that Jason had promised.

Sure, I could be safe. But i would never be happy. My life would be nothing.

Will's lips against mine solidified my decision.

I didn't need safety. Sure, it would be nice.

But Will was all I needed.

I leaned in closer, letting myself enjoy the moment. 

(word count: 1005)