Best of Me

FIVE

"Bey baby please don't do this to me! Please!" Jay weaped from the other side of the door. "Beyonce I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! Please baby don't leave me like this. I just need help baby please!" He sobbed from the door. I slid down the wall and my purse in my arms crying. "Shawn you hurt me so much. It's for the best." I whispered to the door. "No Bey, it's not. We could go to counseling whatever it takes baby." The sudden thought of him with girls flooded my mind and I started to go off.

"No Shawn it is for the fucking best. You have all these hoes saying you're over me on the internet, but you're sitting here begging for me not to divorce your ass! Oh and to put that on top of things you have a baby on the way and you don't want a divorce?! No Fuck that. We are finished. Done. What we had is over with. I don't want to be even in the same fucking space as you. Stay the hell away from me and my kids you fucking drunk and whore. If you don't leave this property I will be forced to call the police." I wiped my tears and threw the purse on the other side of me. "I'm sorry, believe me I love you." I heard him whisper then I felt him press his forehead against the warm wooden door. After a minute or two I knew he was gone and out of my presence. I stayed still and kept crying. As I slowly stopped crying the more I started to realize that I was taking my ring off.

When I did I was reminded of the IV. The number that brought us together. I remember getting the ink on my skin. "Ahh shit look at my baby lookin all sexy getting a tattoo and shit." I laughed and bit my lip teasing him then winked. "Girl you better stop we in public." I laughed once again and looked down at the IV. "I'm so glad I did this baby." I reached up and stroked his face with my other hand. "Now we together forever baby. Ain't nobody breaking this up." I wish it would be the truth. I wish we coulda been forever, but we aren't.

And I hate to say I love you when it's hard for me.

The next day, it was just so silencing the kids are in Houston with their Grandmother and I have an empty Rowland house to myself. "Shawn just fuck me! Why won't you make love to your wife?" I questioned him putting on my silk robe crossing my arms. "I just don't want to have sex with you." I felt tears start to prick my eyes and I whispered "You don't want me anymore?" He was silent and I left the room and cried myself to sleep.

And I hate to say I want you, when you make it so clear you don't want me.

The door opened and Drake walked in with a bright smile on his face. "Bey what's wrong?" My bottom lip quivered and I just broke down. "You gave him the papers?"

I nodded and wiped my tears. "Awe Bey baby it's alright. Now you aren't trapped in a relationship anymore you could be happy." He wiped my tears then gave me a hug. Damn, I just wish we didn't have to do this.

"C'mon Shawn don't leave me like this!" I cried hurt as he kept packing his stuff. "I need you." "Well you don't act like it! We aren't fucking and just cause you lost a baby doesn't mean you act so heartless to me! I'll see you when I see you." He yelled so cold at me. A couple hours later I get a call and he is out with some bitch.

And I hate to say I need you I'm so reliant, I'm so dependent, I'm such a fool.

The man I thought was supposed to protect, care for me, love me, and stay with me is getting a divorce from me. When they say love hurts it really does. I wonder how the kids are gonna take it. They are just so young.

My phone rang and I picked it up not looking at the number. "Hey Bey I was wanting to know if you could be a special guest at my show next month. I got a dance we could do that my choreographer just taught me and I want you to join me. If that is okay with you?" I cheesed and nodded my head like he could see me. "I would love that. Just have you and your choreographer come over tomorrow and you can teach me." I heard him chuckle.