A Story From Experience; Relationship's

Yellow

"You cannot change what you refuse to confront."

Yellow He/Him Male

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Here's the tale I didn't think I would end up uploading for awhile. Hope you enjoy, and I'm sorry if it is 'sadder' then normal.

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This relationship ended up veing my longest relationship. 5 months 27 days, from September 30th 2022 - March 27th 2023. In fact, I'm writing this on the 29th, thats why it may be 'sadder.'
p.s. This is the same person as Sam the second, vrchat relationship too.

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I ended up realizing I still had feelings for this wackjob sometime during the summer, and I decided to act upon them (finally) in September.

I was obsessed with him, like a unhealthy obsessed. I ignored all the bad things I could've clearly saw if I wasn't always so 'positive.'

By obsessed I mean, I had anxiety, way worse than normal, during anything, anywhere, anytime. I wanted to know if he messaged me, even liked me, maybe he hated me, do I even have a chance, STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM! Was what always ended up happening. I wouldve probably killed someone if he would've asked, or just so I could have another chance.

I had watched over all his medias for any clues, always read his bio on discord and vrchat once a day, made sure to message him to see if hes okay, looked over our old messages and wished that was the current us and told myself how stupid I was for ending it before.

Nevertheless, I ended up telling him the actual reason why I broke up with him beforehand and that I still had feelings for him.

During the week that followed, thats when I should've noticed some signs. He all of a sudden started talking to me a whole lot and showing he 'cared', being more genuine instead of bland. He became somewhat flirty, and put in his status, "What if I love both of you?" (This matters later.)

He ended up asking me out, and we started dating on September 30th, 2022. I was happy, very very happy, but also worried. How could I know if he was just using this opportunity to get revenge on me? As far as I knew I hurt him really badly before.

After our one month, most of those worries were gone. I figured he wouldn't have stayed that long if what I thought was the case.

After our second month, I was still as happy as could be. That was the beginning of most of the troubles, though. The last time I had 'saw' him was before our second month/before Halloween.

Not only that, but we started to barely talk. At all. A few messages a day, maybe an actual conversation here and there. When I tried to talk to him about it in my New Year's paragraph and an actual full blown conversation about just that, I just a "I knooow and I miss youuu" and with the that paragraph he responded with, I got "I honestly don't really care that we haven't seen each other in a long while, just getting a message from you brightens my day," or something like that.

My first emotion towards that was overjoyment. I was so happy and I thought the message was super sweet. Now I just despise it.

He matched with three different people, his pfps, and with this other person at the end of our relationship, wouldn't have been that big of a deal if I wasn't already getting suspicious of him cheating.

Next thing I know his status is "iloveallofyousm" or something along those lines, and the next day he's matching pfp with someone else.

The day we broke up his bio said 'Taken.' It said that minutes before he broke up with me, and it was still there for a few days after we split. Wether he would consider that cheating or not, I dont care. I do.

He would've had to talk to that person during our relationship, and he got with them and then broke up with me !! Couldn't wait five minutes? Well, they broke up with him anyway, so whatever. Karma is a bitch.

Since this has happened, I thought a lot about what all he's said to me during our relationship. I remembered the what if I love both of you crap.

I remember how he told me about how he was talking to this girl before he got with me, but she blah blah but its okay bc he 'has his Adrian' (me).

I remember that I thought, "I was the second option, but at least I was a choice."

No. Fucking. Shot.

I was always his backup anyway, huh?

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730 words