A Fiery Dalliance

XXIV

"We always see our worst selves. Our most vulnerable selves. We need someone else to get close enough to tell us we're wrong. Someone we trust." David Levithan, Naomi and Ely's No Kiss List

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XXIV.

Joe and Ed made their way back towards Ashwood House after their conversation, with Joe failing to unburden himself as his brother had requested.

Joe was entirely trapped inside his mind as he worried about what was to face him upon returning to the house. If Ed had not been there, he would have turned around and walked in the opposite direction and would not have stopped until he had reached the Scottish border.

Ed knew that Joe's battle was an internal one, and not one that he was about to share. So, he simply put his arm around his brother's shoulder, gave him a tight squeeze, before releasing him again. "I've got you, brother," he murmured, repeating the sincere sentiment that he had stated on several occasions.

As the house came into view across the flat green, Joe spotted a rider in the distance. The house was not at all awake despite the hour. Not even the grounds servants had risen to tend to their chores outside. But a rider was about, and he rapidly changed direction upon spotting the twins walking.

As he drew closer, Joe stiffened, recognising their father's imposing posture before his face could become clear.

"Father knows we switched places last night," Joe worried under his breath.

"I know," replied Ed. "When I'd managed to find my composure, I went back into the ball as you and Father knew it was me immediately. He is in a foul mood with us both."

"He would be in a foul mood with you," Joe muttered. "I am certain he wishes a plague upon me."

Ed did not refute Joe because he must have known that Joe was right. John Parish galloped at great speed towards his sons, and his stern and filthy brow became evident as he neared.

John pulled on his horse's reins some ten feet from Joe and Ed and glared at the both of them. "Are you determined to ruin us?" he barked impatiently.

Ed's arm snaked around Joe's waist in a protective manner.

"You are not five! Switching places, God help me!" he cried. "We are only fortunate that the majority of the Beresfords' social circle are blind and stupid and cannot tell you apart. Anyone with half a brain could see that the both of you were not whom you were claiming to be."

"We are fortunate then, Father," Ed replied coolly, "that the Beresfords' social circle is blind, stupid, and brainless. Our secret is safe."

John's eyes narrowed on his favourite and, if he'd had his way, only son. "Mind your mouth, Edmund," he snapped. "You are never too old to be put over my knee for a thrashing." John then turned his attention to Joe, and Joe felt his stomach drop. "I want to know everything that was said between you and Perrie Beresford while you were prancing about as your brother. Everything. So help me, God, if you said a word to spoil this potential match then you will wish that you had never been born."

Joe could not remember a time when his father had directly spoken to him without it containing a threat of some sort, and it often reflected some intention of rendering him miserable, as though John's behaviour towards him otherwise was warm and tender.

"I told you last night that Perrie did not know that it was me," Joe managed to lie in a blank tone. He had told his father that the night before, and at the time he had believed it to be the truth. He only later found out that Perrie had become only the second person in his acquaintance that had the talent of knowing Joe from Ed.