all our stars, bench trio

chapter twenty-nine

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

september 12, 2021

"What type of music do you like?" I ask, trying to distract Xia for a minute from trying to teach me how to use chopsticks.

"Hm. I like Stevie Nicks. I've listened to Will's work, too. I liked Since I Saw Vienna."

"Hm. Stevie Nicks is a valid choice. Though personally, I prefer Will's work in Lovejoy."

"Wait, what's Lovejoy?"
The question catches me somewhat off-guard. I'm not used to having friends that aren't streamers. "Uh, it's his band. He just came out with an EP back in May."

"Do you mind if I put it on?"

I chuckle. "I'm not sure why I would mind."

Xia shrugs. "What did you say it was called?"
"The band or the EP?"

"Both."
"Are You Alright? by Lovejoy."

She retrieves her phone and holds it close to her face "Hey, Siri, play Are You Alright? by Lovejoy."

The first track, Taunt, plays, and Xia returns to eating her takeout sushi. I attempt to use chopsticks again, but I declare the effort futile.

"Hey, Xia? Do you know where the forks are?"
"Yeah, next to the sink. While you're up, can you grab me the pill jar in the cabinet above the microwave?"

"Yeah, absolutely, just give me a second." I grab a fork and check the cabinet like she asked. I give her the jar once I find it, and ask "What are those for?"

She swallows a too-big bite of sushi. "Those are estrogen pills. I'm trans."

"Oh. How does that work if you're blind?"

Xia shrugs. "I've known I'm trans since I was little, even since before I went blind, but I'm pretty sure I'd still be trans if I was born blind. I know it's a little different for me, not being able to have body dysphoria anymore, and I don't really know what I look like anymore, but this feels right."

"I think I can understand that. I'm... not trans, I don't think. But I get that. You make a pretty girl, by the way."

She smiles, which makes my heart flutter.

"Thank you. You're pretty too."

I laugh. "How do you know?"

"I just do. You're pretty."

"Thanks," I say, going along with the joke. I honestly don't look that pretty right now. I've got on an old flannel and too-long jeans, and my hair is frizzy. I don't even have concealer on. "Appreciate that."

"No problem." She runs sandy-colored fingers through her hair, pulling it up into a ponytail, then letting it back down again.

"... Are you having trouble with your hair?"

"Not really, it's just that my ponytails are too loose because my hair tie is too big."
"Uh, I could... braid it for you? If you want? I braid my own hair all the time, so it shouldn't be too hard."

She's silent for a while, which is mildly offputting, but eventually, she agrees. I have her sit down on one of her kitchen stools and I sit down on top of her counter behind her. I separate her hair into three sections and start to work. I try to hide that my hands are trembling as much as I can.

"I haven't had my hair braided before," she says.

"I guess there's a first time for everything. Keep your head still, or it'll come out crooked."