The Grumpy Sunshine Series

The Pet Predicament (Part 2)

Originally Posted: 12/08/2022

"Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?"

You try to keep count of the amount of why's that leave Tony's mouth, but they're coming too fast and in too great a number to keep track. You give up, putting your fingers down after the 20th 'why'. "I've lost count."

Sam wince deepens with every why that echoes throughout the conference room. "Me too. It's gotta be pretty bad. That vein on his forehead is popping out again."

"You think he knows?" you ask Bucky.

Steve nods, answering for Bucky, "He knows."

Sam leans over from the seat beside you, "I know he's mad, but the breath control is kinda impressive. He hasn't stopped in like five minutes."

Tony's long winded, one word rant ends with one last resounding, "Why?!"

"Alright," Clint chuckles slouched in the seat across from Sam, his hands behind his head. "Which one of you broke Tony?"

Tony stops his pacing, whirling around to face the conference room table with a glare.

"Let's see," Tony starts, his voice dripping in sarcasm. He starts pointing his finger around the table where each of your team mates sit, all who are trying to hide their own equally guilty expressions. "Eenie meenie minie - you three. It's always you three!"

You visibly cringe as Tony's fingers land on you with Sam and Bucky sitting on both sides of you. As he drops his pointing finger, you meekly raise your hand. "Could we just get some clarification on what we did this time?"

Tony sharply inhales, his shaking fist curled in front of his mouth. "The fact that you need clarification means that there's a problem!"

But Sam immediately knows what's going on.

It's too much to be a mere coincidence. And in spite of his begging to Steve to not reveal the secret about your dog living on the Compound, he knew it was only a matter of time before Steve told. The man just couldn't help it. Secrets built up inside of Steve until they all burst out of him all at once.

Still, Sam held onto hope that after Steve accidentally saw him carrying a large assortment of dog toys just an hour ago, that Steve would somehow miraculously, finally, be able to keep the secret. At least until you and Bucky found a way to break the news to Tony yourselves.

It's clear to Sam that Steve wasn't able to do that. Sam leans over the conference table, using his hands as a makeshift barrier from the rest of the table, he pointedly hisses under his breath to Steve, "What did you do?"

"I - I," Steve anxiously stammers, before slapping his hands on the table in defeat. "I told him alright! Tony knows about Max, okay?"

"Weak," Sam hisses under his breath. "So weak."

"Or," Steve interjects, trying to come up with the best defense for himself. "Or maybe I'm just the only person strong enough to tell the truth."

"Yeah, okay," Nat scoffs, slightly mocking Steve. "Whatever you have to tell yourself, Cap."

"You told Steve? I can't believe you!" you scold Sam.

"Hold on, Sam, exactly how long have you known about this?" Tony demands.

"See? I can keep a secret! I could've told him that everyone else knew too!" Steve proudly declares.

"What?" Tony indignantly fumes, eyes comically wide.

"What?" Steve stammers, trying to play off another accidental secret reveal. "No - I didn't- no one else-"

"Dude," Sam sighs, shaking his hung head.

Tony sharply inhales, eyeing every single person in the conference room. "Exactly how many of you knew about the dog living in the Compound?"

Everyone's eye remain down on the table as all hands in the room go up.

"I told you minutes after I found out," Steve adds, his head held high.

Tony deeply inhales, narrowing his eyes at Steve. "Only because you get all sweaty and nervous when you lie, Rogers."

"Snitches get stitches, Steve," you whisper, leaning over Bucky's seat to grimace at Steve.

"Super dark, Pinkie. Either way, it doesn't matter, no pets in the Compound, you all know that," Tony reminds the room.

"Uh?" Sam raises his hand in objection. "That's hardly fair. You let Spidey keep the spidey."

"Don't bring Harry into this," Peter objects. "They're a great pet."

"You named your pet spider Harry?" Clint questions, his lips pulling in to stifle his laughter.

"Well, it's actually a tarantula," Peter corrects. "I could show you a picture if you-"

"Kid," Tony interrupts, rapidly shaking his head. "Not now. The tarantula was different, it stays in a little box and doesn't bother anyone. And it certainly won't ruin the floors."

"Max is already house trained. He doesn't go inside... Anymore. Promise," you swear, raising your right hand as you attest to Max's good behavior. Then, you drop your hand, gesturing to the room, "And everyone already loves him! Especially when he wears that cute little bow tie Sam got him."

You hear coos at the mental image of your little golden retriever wearing a bow tie around his neck followed by hums of agreement.

You pout your bottom lip, giving Tony your best puppy dog expression. "Please, please, please? Can we keep him?"

Sam chuckles from beside you, "She said the same thing when she met Bucky."

You swat Sam's shoulder while still maintaining your pleading expression, "You hush."

Tony takes a large deep breath of concession, his eyes rake over each of your guilty expression. With a final roll of his eyes and a groan of frustration, he caves. "Does anyone else have any pets they'd like to disclose before Steve tattles again?"

"I've had a cat for like two years now," Nat admits. "So does Carol."

As you settle back in to your seat, you lean closer to Bucky and quietly mutter, "Does this mean we should tell him about Alpine too?"