You vs. My Whole Life | Bang Chan

Thunderous

A few meters away from the battle, on a hill stood an older man, propping himself on a wooden stick. He was the one that had uttered the last sentence and pulled everyones attention on himself. His expression was nothing less than arrogant and angry.

"D-Dad?" Taeyong was blinking rapidly, pure confusion settling on his face.

My heart stopped. You meant to tell me that this man was Lee Sooman?

Taeyongs father. The person who turned Chan into a killer? The reason for this entire debacle and Chans entire career path?

The person who was supposed to be dead?

Chan pressed me against his back, his hand squeezing mine so tight it almost hurt. I could feel his heartbeat hammering against my chest. My gaze quickly went to my gun, to reassure it was still there. I might need it any second now. 

"Who else would it be, you useless son of a bitch?" The once believed to be dead man spat in his sons direction. "Can't believe you're not even able to kill the person you think killed your old man. I've given you so many years to prove yourself and you still manage to make me regret putting you into this godforsaken world."

"We're leaving," Chan managed to whisper into his device with a forced control over his otherwise rough voice. "Seungmin, you ready?"

Taeyong just stared at his dad as if he had seen a ghost. Well, not too far off actually. 

"D-Dad I- how are you alive?" His facial expression seemed to be frozen, just like every single person on this field. Only his eyes shone with emotion, tears building in them.

Well, that's what you would call them if we were talking about a normal human being. Although I wasn't sure someone like Taeyong was even capable of emotions. 

"That's Sir to you!" Lee Sooman barked out, his face turning red in anger. "You really thought that I, the king of mafias, would get killed by a disobedient servants' offspring?" He let out a laugh that made my whole body shiver with goosebumps. 

"Ready when you are, bro," Seungmins voice answered.

"Sorry, Sir- I just- why didn't you let me know you were alive?" Taeyongs entire attitude had changed. He looked like a lost puppy getting scolded and beat up by his owner.

"To teach you a lesson! You weren't man enough to lead!" Lee Sooman was screaming at his son, rage taking over his body. "Imagine my frustration when I check up on you just to find out you're still a fucking sissy after all these years!"

Chan was 8 when he thought he had killed this man, Taeyong didn't seem much older than Chan, which meant that he was around 9 or 10 when his father expected him to become a ruthless gang leader?

Father of the fucking year.

"Now!" Chan yelled, throwing something onto the ground and pulling me with him while sprinting in the other direction, away from the scene. 

Multiple smoke bombs around us exploded, covering our bodies entirely, hiding our escape. Seungmins art, no doubt.

"You lost little brother," Yeji mocked once we arrived back at Stray Kids Headquarters. She ruffled Hyunjins hair playfully, whose bitter expression turned even more sour by her action.

"You practically stole that one guy that was clearly in my zone, therefore I consider us at least even," Hyunjin complained annoyed at his sister. 

"They tend to count how many opponents they hurt in a fight. It's some sort of competition for them." Felix tried to explain when he saw the question marks written on my face. 

"Watch me win by far next time," Hyunjin promised, earning a smile from his sister. "In your dreams, Hyunnie".

My hand was still clutched tightly in Chans who was next to me but seemed a million miles away at the same time. I slightly nudged his shoulder with mine, making him look up.

"Are you okay?" My voice sounded weak. Although I wasn't a great help in the fight, it had sucked out all of my energy. 

He dropped my hand to run both of his through his hair in what seemed like an attempt to calm his thoughts. Then he slowly shook his head.

"No, I don't think that's..." He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. The dangerous man in front of me had turned into the eight year old helpless child. "I'm fucked up, Y/N." 

I almost let out a chuckle. Almost. 

I know. That's why it was so hard for me and took so long to accept what was between us in the first place. But I didn't say that. Instead I decided to keep my mouth shut. 

"I just found out that I'm apparently not a killer and now I wish I was one." His laugh was cold, no emotion showing. "Lee Sooman is not dead. I did not kill him. Everything I thought happened that night is a blur and I can't figure out- how fucked up is it that I actually prefer I had killed him?" He shook his head again as if to get rid of those thoughts. "I used to regret that night and what I did every.single.fucking.day." He put his head in his hands, his entire body shaking. 

Fear? Anger? Sadness? I couldn't tell.

I put a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to calm him and decided to repeat Minhos words back to Chan. 

"Nothings changed." It felt stupid because, just as on the battleground, I didn't believe it one bit. 

Broken eyes met mine. 

"You're still you. Just because that guy rose from the dead doesn't change the person you are, Chan. It's confusing and makes you feel the pain you thought you buried and I'm sure it makes a lot of our next missions more difficult, but it doesn't change who you are, what you have and whose with you. It just added another enemy to the list." 

Chan took another deep breath, then he abruptly stood up from his crouched position. "Thank you from getting me out of my head." He pressed a quick kiss to my temple. "I need to talk to our newest addition."

Johnny and Sana were all cuddled up in her room when we practically barged in. 

"Judging by Taeyongs reaction, he didn't know either?" Chan asked without wasting time on any greetings or apologies for crashing their privacy. Johnny didn't seem to be bothered by it.

"No, it was the main reason for your rivalry and he despised you because he thought you killed his dad." Johnny stopped hugging Sana and stood up. "How do I properly thank you for helping Sana and also getting me out? I owe you big time."

Chan glanced at me and then looked towards Sana. "It's not a big deal."

Johnny laughed as if Chan just told him a funny joke. "Yeah, right. We both know exactly how big of a deal exactly it is. You want me to get on my knees and swear my loyalty to you? You want me to forever clean and cook for you and your crew? I'll do it and it still wouldn't be enough." Johnny raised his eyebrows. "You broke the alliance and put your entire team in danger, including your girl just to try and save me, a traitor, who literally kidnapped your girl-"

"You've also tried to date her to take her away from me, don't try me, Suh." Johnny shut his mouth immediately. "Just thank her and don't pull any shit and we're fine." Chan uttered through gritted teeth, nodding to where I stood. 

Johnny grinned and took a few steps towards me. "Thank you. I know it might not mean a lot but I want to offer you my protection from now on." I just nodded in response. Sana was still frozen in place, watching the scene before her play out with big eyes.

"Oh and Suh," Chan started again, making Johnny turn his attention towards him. "If you hurt Sana, you're dead." Johnnys eyebrows went so high, they almost jumped out of his forehead and hid in his hairline. Sana let out a relieved breath.  

"Noted, boss."

The tension in the room went as fast as it had entered and none of us heard the whirling of air outside, signaling the helicopter coming closer.