Broken [Book 1 of 2]

Chapter Twelve-

Lucy held me close. She held me tight while I cried. I cried, no words were spoken except for Lucy continuously telling me that it's going to be okay.

During that phone call I had confessed that I wanted to hurt myself, that I wanted to purge until I couldn't no more. Finally I had told her that I wanted to take a few too many pills, my paranoia / anxiety / depression was worse than ever.

She had told me she would come over no matter how far I was, so she asked for my address and drove over here, illegally (she's 15 and supposed to have an adult in it with her at all times).

"Everything's going to be okay," Lucy whispered, leaning her head on mine, which was leaning on her shoulder.

"No it's not," I unexpectedly said, hoping not to wake my parents, "you don't understand! If I gain any more I'm gonna hit 100 pounds!" Even though that wasn't the only ting on my mind, it was the freshest.

"Listen," Lucy said, tilted my head up so I could look in her eyes, "you've made it this far, why stop now? If you've survived this long I can guarantee you that you can survive longer."

"I've missed you so much," I sobbed, putting my head back on her shoulder. She wrapped her arms around me again, squeezing me tight.

Even though we hadn't seen each other in ages, we still shared a bond that would make it seem like we've been living together all our lives.

"Want me to try to get a hold of Cam?" Lucy asked me, reaching towards her phone like she already knew the answer. I nodded, but it matter since she was already calling him.

"Here, I'll put him on speaker," she said, bringing the phone to her lap.

After a couple rings, Cam answered sleepily, "Hello?"

"Hi, Cameron, it's Lucy. Jayde's friend. I'm at her house right now and we need you here. Do you think you can come?"

It took him a moment to respond, but when he did he chuckled, "Now? Lucy it's two in the morning!"

"I'm sorry but it's important, Jayde's crying and feeling suici-" Lucy was interrupted by Cam once he heard where this was going.

"I'll be over a-s-a-p!" He hung up.

Once the call was over, I started crying again. I had managed to stay quiet during the call, but I couldn't any longer. I don't know what's wrong with me, I was so happy. But then everything came back to me as soon as I stepped on the scale.

Not too long after I heard a knock on the door.

"Shit," I almost yelled, knowing that my parents probably woke up. Surprisingly, they didn't. Lucy rushed to the door as I stayed in bed.

"Jayde, are you okay?!" Cam asked, sitting down on the bed, hugging me.

"No," I quietly cried, "but have I ever been?" Lucy joined Cam, and I was basically a sandwich.

I was in the middle of the tightest group hug involving the greatest friend ever and the greatest boyfriend ever (*cough* who's also Cameron Dallas *cough*), why am I sad? I have no right to be sad! I'm basically living the perfect life!

"I'm so selfish," I cried, letting my thoughts take over.

"No you're not," they both said in unison. I didn't believe them, but I didn't want to argue so I kept quiet.

I cried and cried, they held me tight. Not much was said, and I started falling asleep. I think I fell asleep, and Cam and Lucy fell asleep next to me, still holding on to me.

•••

I woke up in the morning, Lucy and Cam still asleep. My eyes hurt, and they were a little crusty, probably from crying myself to sleep. It was kinda nice to get all of that out, with my two favorite people right there. I rubbed my eyes, trying not to wake my friends.