W⃨i⃨l⃨d⃨f⃨l⃨o⃨w⃨e⃨r⃨ |⃨ I⃨s⃨s⃨a⃨c⃨ L⃨a⃨h⃨e⃨y⃨ [1]

thirteen: you look like a movie, you sound like a song

Erica knew that Rowan was distracted.

Erica had stuck in the girl's home yet again when no one was around and took her right there at the door of her room, before going for another round on her bed.

And yet the whole time Rowan's mind was somewhere else.

Erica watched her as she lay bare-chested against Rowan's chest, both girls breathing in sync as Rowan stroked Erica's arm.

"you're distracted" Erica noted. Rowan blinked and smiled sheepishly when the girl caught her zoning out.

"Sorry. all this Kanima business is just getting to me." Rowan sighed.

Erica frowned and reached up to play with her lower lip," we don't think about that stuff when it's just us."

Rowan stiffened.

"us"

Erica bit back a curse as she quickly withdrew her hand. Erica knew from the day they started this that Rowan wasn't looking for a relationship, for strings attached.

And yet Erica made the rookie mistake of falling in love with her. Erica felt like she had always loved her, even before the bite.

Erica would watch her during class, and how confident she was. It was the thing about her that turned her on the most. Rowan had always been kind to her and never treated her like an outcast.

Maybe it was because back then Erica scrambled for any sort of attention thrown her way that made her fall in love with Rowan, but even after the bite nothing changed.

Erica could have anybody she wanted, and yet she only wanted her.

But Rowan couldn't say the same.

"bad choice of words." Erica tried to laugh. Rowan eyed the blonde warily as she slowly unwrapped her arms around her.

"Erica I made or clear going into this that this was nothing more than just sex." Rowan sighed as she sat up, Erica doing the same.

"I know that, I know but I just -"

Erica swallowed.

"I thought I could change your mind"

Rowan wanted to scream.

She didnt want to hurt Erica. It wasn't even that she didn't like Erica, she did. She had no doubt they would be a good couple but there was still such a large part of Rowan that could never let herself commit.

There would always be that part of her that held her back.

Maybe it was because she was afraid, afraid of that feeling of her partner breaking her heart, f they walked out on her.

Like her dad did.

There was a reason Rowan was so guarded all the time. Her father leaving; left her in a state of sadness and despair and she never wanted to feel that way again. Even if that meant never letting herself fall in love.

"Erica I- I can't do anything but just sex. Sex is the best I can give you and I don't think you understand how sorry I am that I can't give you more." Rowan whispered as her eyes closed softly. Erica wanted to be mad, she wanted to figure out why this girl would never let anyone get close to her, but looking at her fragile frame she softened.

"Im guessing you don't wanna keep this up?" Erica asked and Rowan bit her lip.

"I think that's for the best,"

"It's okay. I guess it's on me for falling in love with you." Erica whispered and Rowan's eyes widened.

"Love?" she whispered dryly.