9: To Be Loved

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"I'm a princess, I'm divisive
Ask me why, why, why I'm like this
Maybe I'm just kinda like this
I don't know, maybe I'm just like this

I say I live in Rosemead, really, I'm at the Ramada
It doesn't really matter, doesn't really, really matter

Call him up, he comes over again
Yeah, I know I'm over my head but, oh
It's not about havin' someone to love me anymore
No, this is the experience of bein' an American whore..."

-"A&W", Lana Del Rey

*****

Saturday's are for sleeping and smoking

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Saturday's are for sleeping and smoking. It's practically the law. At least for me it is.

Today my usual activities of smoking a bowl and eating a bag of chips were overturned by my future hellfire club members. Max led them right to me after we all met and now they're pounding on my door at all hours of the day. I finally learned to lock it after I woke up to Dustin staring at me the first time. You'd think they'd be a little less bold after only knowing me a week but apparently these kids have no boundaries.

It's finally close to 10:00 PM when I get home from dropping them off. We started a summer D & D campaign and lost track of time and ended up playing for close to eleven hours. Don't judge.

I'm just about to start smoking when the phone starts ringing. Fuck. I just want to smoke in peace. After waiting a couple rings hoping it's just a wrong number, the ringing continues and with a groan I run over to answer it. Immediately loud music and shouting blare into my ears.

"Uh...hello?" I ask, unsure if I can even be heard over the chaos on the other line.

"Eddie?!" Johanna asks breathlessly, putting me on alert instantly.

"Yeah?" It's party night and I already told Camila I'd be with the guys today so I wouldn't be making my usual rounds in her yard. Even if I had, I wouldn't have stuck around after. I don't have to worry about seeing Camila anymore. She's my friend and I know I'll see her again.

"Get over here!" Johanna shouts into the phone. "She needs you!"

I don't even answer. I just hang up the phone and jump in my car.

*****

When I pull up Johanna is pacing around in the driveway nibbling on her fingernails. She does that when she's anxious, I've come to learn. I'm surprised she has any left sometimes.

I shake my hands out once I step out of my car, my knuckles sore from the death grip I had on my steering wheel on the drive over here. Of all people Johanna Torres is the last person to call out for help, so I knew deep down in my gut something was wrong. Really really wrong.

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