14: A Bad Feeling

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"Remember when you hit the brakes too soon?
Twenty stitches in the hospital room
When you started crying, baby, I did too
But when the sun came up, I was looking at you
Remember when we couldn't take the heat?
I walked out, I said, "I'm setting you free"
But the monsters turned out to be just trees
When the sun came up, you were looking at me
You were looking at me
You were looking at me
Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet?
Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods?
I remember
Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet?
Are we in the clear yet, in the clear yet? Good
Oh, I remember..."

-"Out Of The Woods", Taylor Swift

*****

I'm sitting in the stands waiting for this stupid race to start and all I can do is map out where the nearest trash can is because I think I'm going to puke

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I'm sitting in the stands waiting for this stupid race to start and all I can do is map out where the nearest trash can is because I think I'm going to puke. Not like in tiny way, but full Exorcist style sickness.

I rub my hands over my face and through my hair while Nancy, Robin, and Johanna sit down around me.

"I have such a bad feeling about this," I groan.

"Oh stop. You said that before some of Owen's races when we lived here too," Johanna sighs with a playful shove to my shoulder. She's right though. I got a similar sickening feeling when I started coming to watch Owen race. Once I learned how capable he was, the fear subsided. I might not have been in love with him but I still worried about his well being.

"Maybe Dustin's got it under control," Nancy nods her head towards the track where Dustin is huddled around Eddie's car. More like death trap.

"Maybe she just needs distraction..." I hear Robin say to the girls, but I'm not really paying attention. I'm resting my head on my palms with my elbows on my knees, trying to stay calm. But Johanna's voice gets my attention.

"Where have all the good men gone —"

"And where are all the gods?" Robin smirks. Oh no. No no no no.

"Where's the streetwise Hercules — " Ah god Nancy not you too.

"To fight the rising odds?" Johanna croons out the line and I bury my head in my hands. I'm not sure if I want to laugh or cry. But the girls remain undeterred.

"Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?" Robin belts out while Johanna shakes my shoulders.

"Late at night I toss and I turn —" I poke my head up to watch Nancy sing.

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