Fates Intertwined (Tere Bin AU)

4. Loss & Pain

Murtasim sat in his office with a cigarette in his hand. He seldom smoked but today he needed something to numb the pain. The pain of the loss he had suffered. The loss of his fiancée, the love of his life. It was late at night but sleep was the last thing that Murtasim wanted to do. He was hurt and broken.

There was a knock on his office door. Then someone entered with a cup of tea in her hands.
"Meerab? Is that you?" He asked in disbelief.
"No bhai it's me, Marium", Marium corrected him as she came in. "I'm sorry! Did I disturb you Bhai?"
Murtasim shook his head. "It's just..."
"I know Bhai you are used to Meerab bringing you tea whenever you work late but today since she isn't here I decided to do it."
"Thank you Marium. That's very thoughtful of you. You can leave now." Murtasim said politely. He wanted to be alone.
Marium placed the cup of tea on his desk and left. Murtasim stared at his tea. Whenever he worked late Meerab would always make tea for herself and him and then she would sit in his office and they'd talk for hours while they slowly sipped on their tea. Sometimes she would also bring her farmaishen. But Murtasim didn't mind as long as she spent some time with him. It was something Murtasim looked forward to every time he worked late. He had recently started to stay in his office deliberately till midnight just so that Meerab would sit and talk with him more. But now, she was gone. Maybe forever.
"Jana hi tha jab tou apni yaadein bhi le jati sath. Mujhy tarpane ke liye unhe kyu chorr gayi yaha?" Murtasim said bitterly as tears flowed from his eyes.
"Tumhe tou koi faraq bhi nahi parega Meerab agar iss takleef ne meri jan leli tou. Tumhe tou apni degree azeez thi. Shayad rishte ke liye han bhi tum ne issi liye kaha tha. Taake tum mere zariye apne khwab poore kar sako. Ek mei hi bewaqoof tha Meerab. Jo samjhta raha ke shayad tumhare dil me bhi mere liye kuch hai. Tumhe mere se behtr zarya mila tou tum foran chali gayi."

Just then Murtasim reached out for another cigarette and realised that he'd gone through the whole box. He sighed and got up to go to his room. It was almost morning now. He could hear the birds singing beautifully just as they did everyday but today even the mesmerising chirping of the birds couldn't make him happy.

***

After leaving Murtasim Bhai's office, Marium decided to go to her mother to see if she was dealing with all this better or worse than Murtasim Bhai. As she went inside Maa Begum's room she saw that her condition wasn't too different from her brother's. She was still in the dark about why Meerab had left but she couldn't help feeling angry at Meerab for hurting the only two people who made up Marium's family.
"Kash mei rok leti Meerab ko. Kash mei ne usse dushman ki beti na kaha hota. Wo meri waja se chali gyi." Maa Begum cried in remorse.
"Dushman ki beti?" Marium asked. All of this was news to her.
"Han beta Meerab ki Maa Malik Mukhtar ki behn thi."
Marium was shocked beyond words. Then she consoled her mother.

Meanwhile Meerab had landed in London. It was a beautiful city she thought. Yet she was already starting to feel a little homesick. This is your home now, she reminded herself.
Baba had a small apartment in London with only 2 bedrooms. As she settled there, she realised how quiet this house was as compared to the hustle bustle at the Khan Mansion.
With nothing to do, Meerab decided to prepare for her admission test. This was the only thing that could keep her occupied enough to not miss Hyderabad.

A few weeks had passed. Murtasim was barely eating or sleeping. He was just barely alive and that's when Maa Begum decided that she should get him married to someone who would take care of her son as he had clearly not been taking care of himself ever since Meerab had left.

When she suggested the idea to Murtasim, he angrily broke a vase next to him and warned her not to talk about it ever again. Maa Begum wasn't a person who would give up so easily so she decided to give him some time before she brought up the topic again.

In London, Meerab's classes had already started. Despite the empty feeling she had about leaving her home, she couldn't help but enjoy her classes. Baba's apartment in London never felt like home to her. Baba was almost always locked up in his office and Meerab just felt lonely and bored whenever she was there. So she spent most of her time outside the house, sometimes studying in a cafe or a public library.

In order to keep herself sane, Meerab had also started keeping a diary. Here she had no one to talk to so keeping a diary only made sense. She had a really talkative personality and she had always enjoyed teasing Murtasim and gossiping with Marium.

The first entry in her diary was:

Dear Diary,

Kisi cheez ki ahmiat ka ehsas uss ke chhin jane par hi kyu hota hai? Murtasim was never more than a good friend for me then why do I find myself thinking about him all the time. And why do I regret breaking his heart so much that I can't concentrate on anything.

Why did Baba bring me here if he couldn't take out time for me. Or to him fatherly love is only to provide for your children? I don't know but now I realise that ghar gharwalon se banta hai. Unfortunately ye apartment sirf ek makan hai jahan 2 log sirf apni zindagi guzar rahe hain lekin jee nahi rahe. I know Baba stays busy with his business but Murtasim bhi tou itna busy rehta tha. Yet he never forgot to spend time with the people he loved. Maybe Baba doesn't love me or he has forgotten how to live with someone after living alone for so long.

Meerab put the pen down and closed her eyes as tears started flowing. Why is it so hard for me to not think of you Murtasim? And why does it hurt so much? She thought to herself.

As she wiped her tears and got ready to sleep, she was reminded of Murtasim wiping her tears and comforting her after Baray Abu passed away. He had pushed his grief aside to comfort his sister and her.

"Just get out of my head Murtasim and let me sleep." Meerab shouted to herself as she lay down to sleep.

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A/N: I had to turn on my sad playlist when I wrote this part and I literally cried my heart out so please do show it some love.