Fool's Gold [Jaylor Fanfiction]

The Armchair Critic

The Next Morning
June 17th; 2023
Joe Alwyn's Point of View
I'm once again waiting in the studio for Taylor to walk in. My guess is she woke up hungover from yesterday and slept in. Then she also had to spend time recovering from the fact she was completely plastered. I have no idea if we're actually going to get anything done today which is extremely helpful. After three hours she finally walks in and tosses her sunglasses on the side table along with her purse. I should start showing up late so I'm not wasting my time just sitting here. I used to find this woman quite respectable, but now she's annoying as hell. She takes out a bottle of Pedialyte and sits down.

"So, how are you feeling?" I ask snidely.

"Don't even get me started. I'm never going to drink again." She groans before taking a large drink.

"According to the bartender, you're going to drink again."

"Screw you." She gives me the middle finger quickly.

"My god, fine. I'll leave you alone." I put my hands in the air slightly as if I were surrendering to her threats.

"Thank you." I watch as she puts her hand away and grabs her phone. She begins to rapidly type and I can tell she's texting someone.

"Who are you texting?"

"None of your business. Plus, why do you care?" She looks back down at her phone and grins.

"You're texting that Tom guy." I sigh realizing she's found her new fling.

"How do you know about Tom?"

"I was there! I was literally sitting right next to you when you asked him if he wanted to have sex! Then he turned you down but gave you his number."

"He said no!? I found his number in my bra this morning. He sent me pictures of himself. Is he catfishing?" Taylor shows me a few pictures of Tom that look exactly like the guy I saw last night. One then catches my eye and I close my eyes in horror.

"Why do you already have a dick pic!? It's been less than 24 hours!" I shout.

"I don't give advice on your relationships and don't worry, he got his share too." She gives me a wink. Oh, god the trauma, so much trauma.

"I can't speak for the dick pic but the rest are definitely him." I shudder and know I'm forever going to have that picture carved into my memory.

"Great, so I'm not being catfished!"

"Sure, yeah. That's what we'll take away from this discussion." I groan loudly. She begins to type again and she bites down on her lower lip. "Are we going to do anything today besides talk to your boyfriend?"

"Shhhh, there are three dots. He's about to text me back."

"I'm going to take that as a no."

"Aw, he sent me a gif of a kitten saying I love you!" She acts like a 16-year-old girl texting a boy on an (American) football team.

"Jesus Christ." I roll my eyes as her eyes stare at the phone, completely entranced. "Taylor, why do you do drugs?" I ask getting bored.

"None of your business." She replies then goes back on her phone.

"Why do you drink?"

"Why do you drink?" She becomes defensive of the questions.

"Why are you a bitch?" It just comes out bluntly. If she's gonna do it I guess so will I.

"You're getting on my nerves. Have you ever thought about shutting up?"

"See, that. Why do you do shit like that?"