Renaissance

Chapter 11

She couldn't believe she agreed to go to thanksgiving with him and his family. This was insane. Totally insane. She had to get out of this. Get sick or a family emergency. She will do anything not to go celebrate with him.

She was deep within her thoughts, going to her dorm. All the voices were tuned out while she brushed against people in her hurry. At this point she was starting to think how she got into such uncomfortable situations and with Derek for that matter. She had to get out of this. One way or another. There wasn't a chance in hell she was going to spend Thanksgiving at the Shepherds. All she had to do is come up with a good excuse. That was stupid. She didn't owe him anything. She can just go up to him and tell him she's not going. It's simple. He'll sleep on it and realise it's a horrible idea and then she'll tell him she's not going. He just needs to come up with an excuse to tell his mother.

He wasn't wrong though, that woman was terrifying. Or just really intimidating. There was no chance of saying no to his mother. She had those light blue innocent eyes staring at you, but her face was saying 'don't you dare say no or there'll be consequences'. She might be exaggerating just a tiny bit, but it was impossible to say no to the woman. She had those typical mom looks. The ones you see in typical hallmark movies. Those cheesy family movies that Meredith was jealous of when she was younger but now, she can't imagine living with a big family who go overboard with decorating the house for holidays. Mrs Shepherd looks like someone who would go overboard with decorating the house. And make the holidays all festive and bright and happy and shiny. Even thinking about it makes her stomach churn.

She really couldn't do this. She can't get through dinner with the whole family and be bright and shiny and smiling all the time. She just couldn't. The mere thought made her want to cry. This wasn't her thing. Being dark and twisty and drinking tequila and eating crappy food on holidays was her thing. Not turkey fresh out of the oven with neatly made tables. That was Izzy's thing. Izzy did the bright and shiny. And the mother thing. She definitely did the mother thing. She also did the boyfriend thing which Meredith never did. Which scared her even more. How was she going to pretend to be someone's perfect girlfriend when she can't even do that in real life? This just couldn't be happening. There was no way that Meredith Grey was spending the weekend at Derek Shepherd's house pretending to be the most loveable, perfect girlfriend that his family expects.

By the looks of his mother, she knows that they're family is all about being there for each other and caring for each other. And when one of them brings home a girlfriend or a boyfriend, there will be an inspection. She did not want to be inspected, not when this whole thing between her and Derek wasn't even real. This was too much to take on, even for Izzy, not to mention her. Derek just had to see that.

"Meredith," someone shook her out of her trance.

"Huh?" she turned, "Oh, hi Izzy," she said in a low voice and turned to unlock her door.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, why?" she went into her room.

"You've been standing in front of your door for god knows how long."

"Oh," Meredith furrowed her eyebrows and put her keys and bag down, "I must've spaced out."

"What's going on?" Izzy leaned against her doorframe and crossed her arms.

"Nothing's wrong, I'm fine."

"Something is obviously bothering you," she said as she closed the door and sat down on her bed, "You can talk to me you know. I know I'm not your person."

"Izzy, that's not true" Meredith cocked her head.

"It's true but it's okay because I don't want to be dark and twisty," she chuckled, "But I'm still here for you."