Dear Samuel,
I'm not sure why I'm writing to you, maybe because every time I showed up at your door someone from our family did the difficult task of sending me away and if the first few times I came with enthusiasm and with the stubbornness that belongs to me after it became more and more difficult to ask a question for which I already knew the answer.
I stopped coming to you but I certainly don't stop thinking about you and love you.
What breaks me the most is not the concern for my heart but for yours and Nate's. The anguish caused by your split. Nate and I are together, I know it's painful for you, but I fell in love with him and I'm no longer going to lie or hide especially from you, because the two of us grew up together, you know me in a deep way as I know you. This, Sam, this thing here no one will be able to take it away from us.
If you're wondering if I've ever loved you the answer is yes, every single day I've spent with you, I haven't lied to you, I've never lied to you.
However at one point I felt like I was going crazy, I felt that I could no longer face those terrible moments when I felt divided in half, when I was missing something, when I didn't feel like It was the right thing. I couldn't go any further and Nate was still nothing at the time. It wasn't his fault. If you want to blame someone, blame me but not him.
I think the two of us alone against the world would have been a beautiful story to tell in the future, I knew how much it could cost me and I wondered if it was really what I wanted. The answer was no. I know it makes you suffer and I know how patient you have been to me but I have no other truth.
That's how things are Sam, I love you, I love you so much, but I don't love you as you would like, your absence is destroying me, I miss a part of me and that part is you, and I can't even ask you to come back because this decision is only up to you.
I think it would have been unspeakably more heinous to go ahead with you without really believing it.
I know you're angry, and I don't blame you but I also know that you can move on, and that if only you looked in front of you you would see so many people who love you, including me and Nate.
It's one of the happiest moments of my life and yet I miss something, you Sam.
My mind understood but my heart keeps ringing at your door.
I apologise for not finding the courage and the words, for not taking my responsibility.
I hope one day you can forgive both me and Nate and not for the love we feel but for not being able to tell you.
I love you and will always be waiting for you.
Blanca.
Samuel folded the paper and put it in his pocket. The fresh morning air filled his lungs. Emma kept running on the athletics track while in Sam's hands he held the stopwatch.
The nightmares about the accident had become more insistent. They were no longer just flashbacks of a few frames, it was a confusing memory that shocked Samuel.
He was angry with his father, he had drunk and smoked marijuana, he had stretched out his hands on the steering wheel, and his father lost control of the vehicle.
The thought made him die inside.
"Hey, I'm done"
Emma awakened him from his thoughts and immediately saw her gaze turn off as she looked at Samuel's hands.
"Don't tell me you didn't ..."
The stopwatch was still flowing in his hands.
"Sorry Emma," he justified himself.
Emma snorted loudly and dropped into the grass near him.
"Would you like to go out With me?" Samuel asked her, looking at her "I mean a real date"
Emma was shocked.
"A date like we dress cute and go somewhere?"
Samuel couldn't hide an embarrassed smile.
"Do you want hang out with me?"
"no, not hang out, a date a really date."
Emma was all sweaty, her tail ruined by the run.
"I can't drive because of my leg...:"
"I'll drive " hurried to say Emma.
Samuel smiled, there were so many thoughts running through his mind, he stooped down and gave her a moulded kiss on the lips.
"Is eight o'clock okay?"
Emma nodded.
Samuel recovered his crutches and walked away.
"Where are you going?"
"There's one more thing I have to do today," he told her as he turned around.
"What?"
Samuel smiled
"Going further"
XX
Dylan was drinking coffee and reading the newspaper in the kitchen. He felt uncomfortable as he thought about Ashley's kiss, he had to call the editor and tell him that he didn't want to cooperate with her anymore, that he would have to find someone else for him.
He should have told Brenda what had happened, she would have understood. She would be on his side, she would get angry, but she would believe him.
Maybe, he thought, there are things that don't need to be said, that hurt and don't matter.
Brenda came in at that moment.
"Good morning handsome boy," she told him, kissing him. He grabbed her by the arm and asked for an even deeper kiss.
"Wow," she replied, "really a good day."
Brenda nodded, "Why is Ashley's car in our driveway?" She smiled ironically.
Dylan felt his throat choking.
"couldn't turn the car on yesterday so I told her she could leave It here and pick It up this morning."
Brenda nodded as she poured coffee.
"I was late yesterday, I apologise," Brenda said.
"It doesn't matter," Dylan replied.
'The kids?'
"The twins are at school and Nate came to pick up Blanca, don't you think things got a little too serious between those two? Are they a little too fast?"
Brenda took the cordless "do you want to ask Jim?" SHe asked him laughing.
"Great joke, honey. Why not.."
Dylan grabbed the cordless and dialed a phone number.
"Good morning Jim" he said looking at Brenda "No, I was really looking for you, Brenda and I were wondering if Nate and Blanca weren't running too much, what do you think? They are sixteen, exactly the age Brenda and I were, did you ever know that the first time we had sex was at spring dance?"
Brenda's face started to blush and she tried to grab the cordless but Dylan prevented it and continued "and that since then we have never stopped, we liked it especially in Brenda's room, in Brandon's, but especially in your and my porsche Wow.. I love my wife".
Brenda grabbed the phone and realised that Dylan's phone call was fake.
Brenda gave Dylan a slight nudge, "shit... ."she laughed
Dylan laughed "next time we'll call Bran..." Dylan stopped without completing the name.
Brandon couldn't answer.
"Sorry," he said looking at his wife.
Brenda shook her head "Dylan, you can talk about him, my brother is still here, he's not gone"
Dylan bit his lips.
"Valerie called me this morning from the Walsh house, tonight Kelly wanted to go to him and she stayed with the kids. I'm worried about Kelly"
"Yes, me too," Dylan replied.
"And I'm worried about you" Brenda finished the sentence by stroking Dylan and running a hand through his hair.
They rang at the door.
Dylan went to open.
Four policemen entered the house.
"Dylan Mckay?"
"Yeah... what..."
The cops had Dylan turn around handcuffing him.
"What's going on?"
"Dylan..." shouted Brenda in a confused state.
"I declare you under arrest ..."
"For what?" Dylan tried to wriggle out of the policeman's grip who forced him to kneel down to handcuff him.
"You are in charge of the rape of Ashley Monroe"
Dylan was in shock "the rape.. what ..?"
Dylan was forced to stand up.
"Brenda calls a lawyer," he told his wife as they took him away.
Shocked Brenda stood in the middle of the living room.
XX
That morning Nate waited for Janet in the parking lot. Waited patiently for his ex-girlfriend to park her black bmw. Janet knew exactly what Nate wanted. She wanted the harassment of Blanca to end but Janet would never end it. Blanca had to pay.
"Without your better half this morning?" Janet asked him sarcastically.
"Can we talk for a moment?"
Janet dismissed her entire group of friends with a single glance and the two were left alone.
"It's been months since Spring Dance, months when you did nothing but humiliate me in front of the whole school, and now you want to talk Nate?"
Nate tried to stay calm and find the best words.
"I'm sorry for what happened Janet, I'm serious, it wasn't supposed to happen this way and I'm also sorry that the footage was screened in front of the whole school, and I know you're hurt."
Janet had a metal look "hurt? My boyfriend fucks another girl in HD and is projected in front of the whole school .. I'm not hurt but humiliated."
"We weren't together, you know that, we had decided to break up and go to Spring Dance together, that's all, we didn't love each other"
Janet looked up "no, Nate, you didn't love me, but I loved you" and as she said it Janet's tone was sincere. In her wickedness Janet was telling the truth.
"Blanca has nothing to do with what happened between us"
She made a hysterical chuckle "Blanca is the reason for what happened between us, because those footage where you banged the South American were not from the day of spring dance, but from the previous months, now what do you want? Are you continuing to fuck her and want my forgiveness? She will pay for what she did, fake, liar, slut, she deserves nothing else."
Nate watched Janet for a moment "how do you know?"
"What?" She asked as she walked away from him.
"How do you know those footage was from previous months.."
Janet gave him a bad smile.
"You just told me," she said.
Nate was left alone in the middle of the parking lot and a truth was illuminated as he watched Janet's body move away. It was her. She had the footage projected.
XX
Dylan was left alone in a room. He couldn't put a single thought together. What was happening was absurd.
Two policemen came in.
"Mr Mkcay I will make things very simple for you, we have the evidence, you make us a statement, the signature and we will put a good word with the prosecutor."
"I don't even know what you're talking about, where is my lawyer"
One of the cops threw a folder from which Ashley's photographs came out, beaten and in tears.
"Do you know this woman?"
"Oh my God" Dylan sighed as he looked at those photographs.
"Yes I know her but..."
"You were at her house last night..."
Dylan closed his eyes.
"Yes, I drove her home and..." Dylan immediately stopped and thought Ashley had suffered a rape and he had been at her house that night.
"Ashley can confirm that I just drove her home"
The two cops laughed.
"Mrs. Monroe made a statement that it was you who assaulted and raped her."
"What?"
Dylan was speechless. He tried to remember what had happened that night, Ashley was fine when he left.
"I won't say anything else," he said, "I want to talk to my lawyer."
"As Mr. Mckay wants, it's your right, for now you are going in the state prison."
Other policemen were called and lifted Dylan by taking him away.
XX
The news immediately spread. It was shot like an arrow and was popularised on all the news.
Dylan Mckay famous writer and husband of actress Brenda Walsh was arrested this morning on rape charges against a co-worker.
The phone at Brenda's house began to ring and the journalists began to settle in front of the gate of the house.
The first statement was from producer Jackson "Incredible how Brenda Walsh did her utmost to sign the false accusations against me while living with a ruthless rapist."
Kelly immediately turned off the television while Brenda was sitting on the couch unable to make any movement.
"You know nothing is true," Valerie whispered in his ear, "You know, don't you Brenda?"
Brenda nodded "they didn't even give me time to understand. They handcuffed him and took him away. Ashley's car is still out here."
"Why is Ashley's car is out here?"
"Dylan said she couldn't... that someone would have to come and get it this morning to fix it."
"And how did Ashley get home?" Valerie asked.
Brenda looked her in the eye "I ... I .. I don't know" she replied then turned to David and Steve "you have to go get kids from school, if the journalists have come this far it will take very little to find them".
Steve nodded "we'll take care of it"
"I can't believe what's happening," Brenda sighed then burst into an unshakeable cry as Cindy held her tightly in her arms.
XX
Nate saw Samuel pass through the school yard and Blanca followed his sad look. His lack belonged to both of them.
Nate sighed and then smiled at Blanca, kissed her on the forehead "I talked to Janet this morning"
Blanca didn't say anything..
"I'm afraid she won't leave you alone"
"SHe is a humiliated person I understand that she is angry with me."
"That's exactly the point"
"What?"
"I suspect she was the one who made those footage of us and had them programmed during the Spring Dance"
Blanca's gaze was shocked.
"How do you know?"
"She knew they were filmed before she and I broke up, how did she know?"
Blanca stared at Nate without giving an answer because they were interrupted by Emma's arrival.
"Hi guys"
"Emma" looked at Blanca "you're beaming"
Emma nodded "Samuel asked me a date"
That news was a shock to both Blanca and Nate "seriously?"
"Seriously," Samuel's voice answered clearly behind them.
Blanca and Nate turned around and looked at him. He was holding himself on his crutches. He didn't smile at them but he had a serene look.
"Sam.." Nate whispered.
Samuel smiled at him.
They were moments of silence.
"Can I have lunch with you?" Asked Samuel.
Nate had been taken off guard, got up from the low wall and made room and Samuel settled down next to him.
Nate and Blanca didn't know what to say.
"I missed you," Samuel whispered that he had begun to fight the monster inside him with all his might.
That moment was interrupted by the school's megaphone.
Blanca Mckay must go to the presidency as a matter of urgency.
Blanca Mckay must go to the presidency as a matter of urgency.
