Fated - Remus Lupin Fanfic

Chapter 15 | Medicine

"So you're supposed to take one of these every three hours," Violet said, sitting on the edge of his hospital bed.

Violet took Remus' medication from his bag, but when she put it on the side of his bed stand he picked it back up and threw it across the hospital room.

She looked at him sadly and went to pick it up but he stopped her. "No, Violet."

Violet looked at him wearily. "So what? You're refusing to take your medicine now? Is this your big act of rebellion, Remus? Because it isn't funny."

He looked out the window, a sharp pain in his side. The nurses were all off on the quidditch pitch, aiding a student who had gotten badly hurt in a game.

"I don't want to prolong the idea that I'm going to die."

"So you're just going to refuse to take your meds? So you can die sooner?"

"If that is what it takes, Violet, then yes."

The mocking smile quickly wiped off her face.

"So, you've just decided that's it then? Just a bit tired so you're just going to basically kill yourself?"

"You don't understand how tiring it is, Vi. It's fucking shit, seeing everyone look at me differently. To them all I am is sick."

"That's because it's all you're making yourself!" She shook her head. "But I'm being put in detention for weeks now for defending you about it and I didn't even get a thank you!"

"You're upset because you didn't get praise for being the little sick boys' hero? People have bigger problems, Violet, get over it." He frowned.

"I'm upset because you didn't even acknowledge the fact I defended you! I mean, I've abandoned my whole life to try and make yours better and I don't even get a thank you?!"

"I didn't ask you to do any of that!"

"You don't have to! It's called being a good girlfriend! It's called being a friend!"

"It feels more like pity." He spat.

She laughed. "So you don't want me to pity you, huh?"

"No, I don't."

Violet stepped closer to him. "Fine then. Remus, I think you are a sad, selfish and mean boy. Everyone is putting all of their lives on hold for you but you're too busy complaining about it. 'Oh no, people love me!' You sound like an entitled prick!" She yelled.

"And I hate to look at you right now because you're being absolutely reckless and stupid!" She panted heavily, tears welling in her eyes. "But I can't look away because I'm so afraid every time I do it will be the last."

Remus looked down at the bandages wrapped around his stomach. "I'm so sick of staying alive." He whispered. "Because I just want to live."

She shook her head softly. "You are living, Remus."

He laughed sadly, then pointed around the hospital room.

"No, I'm not. Skipping classes to get my blood taken. Missing year group parties to take medication. And god forbid I actually do get to go to a party it's not like I could even drink because the alcohol would conflict with my illness and meds. But you, Violet... you can do all of those things and more and you're skipping it all to be with me."

"And it's not even like I'm cool. I mean, I cry at weddings, I get spoon-fed half of my meals and nobody is really my friend other than you and the guys. Every day I wonder if you're my girlfriend because you love me or if it's because you want to mend the year of our friendship that we were apart." He sniffs. "I just want to be treated human again."

"Not like a werewolf, not like a sickness, but just me."

Violet softly touched his hand, her fingers spread to not touch the needle. "Remus, you are... so much more than your illness. I know we've all been a bit overbearing with this whole thing but... we love you so much and it hurts to see you spend the rest of your life wallowing."

He didn't look at her as he continued to cry.

"Hey, I have a new Bowie vinyl I haven't listened to yet. If you want I can go and get it and my record player and we could listen to it together?"

"Come on, Vi. I know there's a party for your astronomy club happening right now. You should be there-"

"I should, yes. But I want to be here." She spoke softly. "I want to sit here with you and listen to David Bowie. I think that would be much cooler than watching gross drunk boys in our year chug beer."

"Oh, really?" Remus laughed. "Listening to Bowie with me is cooler?"

Violet grinned. "Yeah, it's like a new thing now."

"And who was the wise person that decided it?"

"Hmm, I'm not really sure." She tapped her lip.

"Was she called Violet by any chance?"

Violet gasped and slapped her knee, grinning. "That's it! Ugh, wow. A woman of many wise words." They shared a warm smile and she got up, holding out her hand to him. "Now come on. You can take your medicine, and then I'll quickly run off and get that vinyl for us."

He took her gentle hand, and as he helped her, Remus' gaze softened. Because to him, she was much more than just a girlfriend who was helping him stay alive.

She was the love of his life who helped him keep on living.

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