Chapter 37: Have faith

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The first sensation that returns to me is touch. My fingers brush a soft, smooth fabric that sends a frisson of fear through me. I've felt this fabric before, in my vision. I've been buried alive.

The panic that overwhelms me in that instant is so basic that there is no reasoning with it. I struggle to push up the lid with no success, and my breathing comes in short gasps. Am I running out of air in here?

The panic lasts seconds or minutes or hours; I have no idea. But just like in my vision, it goes away when I remember I have a choice. Safe in my bra is the tiny case with the last pill Harriet gave me. I pull it out, and the container rattles. It's instant relief to know that I have a way out of this nightmare.

As my heart returns to a more normal speed, I remember exactly how my vision ended. I took that pill and swallowed. No one could blame me if I took it now. I might be buried underground, or sealed in this coffin until it's time to be cremated. My throat will go drier and drier, and I might not be able to swallow the pill again. If I take it now, the peace I've been yearning for will finally wash over me.

But I hesitate. Harriet asked me to have faith, and she wouldn't say those words lightly. She must have intended to fool Strand into thinking they'd killed me so that I could escape from their clutches for good. I can't believe that she'd ever intended for me to wind up here, trapped, but the best plans go awry. I know mine always do.

I can picture Harriet's face if she opened this coffin and found a corpse. She'd understand, but all her work would be for nothing. It might kill a tiny piece of her spirit, and I can't stand that.

On the heels of that thought comes the memory of Justus swearing that he wouldn't let me face any more suffering alone. He must have been frantic when he found that I'd been snatched from the Chrysalis by Strand's Deans. What if he's the one who opens the lid and finds me gone?

For however long it takes, I will wait in here for my friends, and trust that they'll find me. I release a long, low breath, accepting that, for once, I won't be the one taking action. I'll be the one getting rescued.

~ ~ ~

I wake to a crack of light and the sound of something scraping nearby. My muddled mind barely has time to make sense of what's happening when the crack widens and a face I wasn't expecting peers down at me.

Mav gives me a huge smile that lights up his face. "I found her!"

"Thank God!"

"Joan, are you okay?"

"Is she...?"

"She's alive!" Mav proclaims, as Harriet, Justus, Marie and Sun all huddle around, peering down at me as I blink up at them. "I knew we'd find her!"

I push myself up on numb arms. "My heroes."

My voice is barely a croak, but my smile must convey the love and gratitude and joy I'm feeling, because tears spring to Harriet's eyes, and Justus kisses my forehead as he leans forward and scoops me out of my coffin. My friends crowd around me, and for a full minute, it's tears and hugs all around.

From the other side of the room, someone makes a noise to catch our attention. It's Officer Ben, and he's standing by a door. For the first time, I register that we're in what appears to be a funeral parlor, and at least a dozen other coffins are on stands all over the room, most of them with their lids open.

"The other officers will be here to collect the casket in less than five minutes," Officer Ben says, shutting the lids to the other coffins as quickly as he can. "We have to move."

Harriet, Justus and Sun all take off the backpacks they're wearing and heave them into the coffin I just exited.

"The bags have weights in them so that when the coffin is lifted it won't be too light," Marie explains.

Officer Ben comes over and presses his thumbprint to a scanner on the front of the casket, and a lock whirrs from somewhere inside, sealing it shut. "It will only unlock with my prints. Ancient technology, but it should be secure enough. It will be underground by the end of the day."

My legs are shaky, but I won't let Justus carry me as we sneak out the back of the funeral parlor into Officer Ben's waiting unmarked SUV.

"You were never supposed to wake up alone in that coffin," Harriet says as soon as the doors close. "I'm sorry it took us so long."

Marie pulls out a bottle of water and I gratefully sip it. "I knew you guys would rescue me."

"I told you that where you go, I go," Justus whispers, interlacing his fingers with mine. Warmth spreads up my arm at his touch, and I lean my head against his shoulder.

"Strand put out false information about where your body was being sent," Sun says as the SUV navigates us through the city.

"It was me and Jin who found out where you really were!" Mav announces proudly.

"I'm not surprised at all," I say, reaching over to give his arm a squeeze. "You always were the best one when it came to getting information no one else could find."

"It was a team effort," Mav says with a seriousness that makes us all laugh.

"Thank you all," I say, my voice hoarse as I look at the faces of my friends. "I wasn't expecting a happy ending, but I'm getting one because of all of you."

Sun, Marie and Harriet all exchange worried glances.

"What is it?"

Harriet pauses before replying. "You're not wrong, Joan. This is a happy ending. And also a new beginning, if you choose to look at it that way."

"I don't understand."

"I used the back door to Strand's servers and edited some information about you," Marie explains. "I made it look like you weren't really cloned from the Joan of Arc DNA. That there was an error, and the baby your mother had wasn't a clone at all, but her natural child."

"Then we leaked that information to every media contact that we have," Sun continues. "They watched your sham of a trial and heard that you'd been executed. Then when the news broke that you're Evolved, there was mayhem. Evolved and Throwbacks alike are calling you a martyr."

"Your death is bringing everyone together," Harriet says, her voice gentle.

"Which is why I need to stay dead," I say, finally understanding what my friends are trying to tell me. So many emotions flood through me at once that I can't make sense of them.

"Don't worry, your parents and friends know the truth," Marie rushes to assure me. "In fact, your parents are filing a lawsuit against Strand for the murder of their Evolved child."

"Between the legal trouble they'll be in and the boycotts against the firm, they'll be bankrupt within the year, by my estimation," Sun says.

Taking down Strand is more than I ever dreamed we would accomplish. But it's also nowhere near enough to make the price worth it. I think of what Addie would say to me in this moment, but I come up blank. I have to fight back tears as I accept the fact that I'll never know what she'd say.

Justus tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. "We'll go somewhere and make a new life together. The one you were meant for before your Status changed everything."

I finger the lavaliere on my wrist that marks me for the entertainment industry. When I got it, I thought my choices were over. The idea of having the opportunity to choose my path is exhilarating but overwhelming.

The traffic picks up, and the sidewalks are flooded with people all heading in the same direction. Some hold signs, and others are chanting. A few even hold flameless candles that change colors together in unison.

We turn the corner and I realize that we're approaching Seattle Secondary. Is this some kind of rally? Or parade?

"I'll get you as close as I can," Officer Ben says from the front seat. "Joan, you'll need to duck down so that you aren't accidentally recognized."

"What's going on here?"

Harriet's brown eyes meet mine. "I wish we didn't have to rescue you and then leave you, but the four of us have a funeral to attend."

That's when I notice the giant portrait next to the doors leading into Seattle Secondary's Little Theater. The funeral my friends are attending—is mine.

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