Never Let Me Go

Reconciliation

Flashback

May 17, 2009

Arianna stood dangerously still. The hot water slammed down on her body, soaking her from head to toe. She had been in there so long that the shower door was all fogged up. The salty tears that continued to leak from her eyes intertwined with the water coming from the showerhead. Her toes and fingers were all prune like seeing as how she hadn't moved for a good twenty plus minutes. She couldn't move though. No, she was stuck. The image from yesterday stuck at the forefront of her mind.

She never did like math. Always hated it. So, it seemed only appropriate that a tiny plus sign would become the symbol that would forever change her life. She couldn't accept the first one though. She took another one. Same thing. Then another one, with the same results as the first two. After five consecutive plus signs, she realized she was wasting her time and money. The outcome was inevitable.

She was pregnant.

The word felt strange on her lips, almost foreign. She had only uttered it once, and since stuck to keeping it in her mind. According to her calculations, she was roughly two months along. Her hand cautiously made her way to her stomach as she looked down. She still wasn't showing. Thank God, but while a bump hadn't formed, other symptoms seemed to increase by the day. She had put on a few pounds. Most of the weight gain seemed to go straight to her chest and hips. Her breast were extremely tender, appetite had increased and of course, no period.

She honestly had no idea what she was going to do, let alone could do. She hadn't told anyone. Not even Maya or Kaydence. As sad it was, the girls seemed to be drifting apart more and more. Kaydence job at their local dance studio along with her other extracurricular activities kept her busy while Maya was consumed with her apprenticeship as their history teachers, Mr. O' Connor's student assistant. Plus, with graduation just around the corner, things were even more hectic.

Arianna had no idea what Kendall's reaction would be like. It was almost impossible to predict it. She learned a long time ago that Kendall's response to certain situations would always leave you on edge. Although, she had a gut feeling he would go ballistic. During the better times in their relationship, he had always discussed them having children one day. The thought used to make her smile. She's always wanted to have children, to be the mother she herself had always wanted, but never had. Now, the thought that not only is she going to be a mother at seventeen, but with a psychotic, controlling, and abusive man like Kendall makes her want to vomit.

She contemplates running away, but that idea is shot down just as it came. Jamie, her legal guardian, with all his money and resources would have her ass located and dragged back home before she could even make the state border.

Wealth had its setbacks.

Thinking of his reaction causes chills to go down her spine. Unlike the child's father, Arianna could mentally picture his reaction. He would kill her. Possibly literally. The scandal it would create would tarnish his image. People would talk. She would become an overnight scandal. Jamie didn't do scandals. If he didn't end her life, he would no doubt kick her out the house with nothing but the clothes on her back.

She started crying harder.

She truly had nowhere to turn and no one to turn to.

Finally gathering up the motivation, and realizing she's beginning to sweat, Arianna finishes her shower. Walking out the bathroom with the towel still wrapped around her body and head, she glances at herself in the full body mirror. She turns away. It's hard looking at her reflection, at what she's become, at what she has allowed herself to become.