billie's pov, 12:54 am
my eyes are on the road, but right now, it feels like there's a million more and they're filling every inch of space around me. it feels like i'm being watched by my own self hatred.
sometimes i'm so self aware it hurts, and other times i feel like i have no clue who i am. it's like i'm watching a constant feed of surveillance of myself.
you're not gay.
you're leading her on.
you're obviously lying to yourself.
you're a liar.
you should just forget about her.
find a new spot to go to at night.
get some fucking sleep for once.
she's not gonna be interested in you if you can't commit.
you have commitment issues, billie.
you hate yourself.
you fucking hate yourself, so why are you so self obsessed?
"shut up." i furrow my brows. i stare angrily at the road ahead of me like it's the pavements fault that i can't accept who i am.
i can't believe i just left like that. i was so close to getting somewhere real with star and i blew that shit in two minutes.
when i finally get past the red lights and back to my apartment, i immediately go into my room and collapse onto my bed. for once, i'd rather be asleep.
star's pov, 4:17 am
the light from my phone illuminates my face under my sheets. i stare at the screen, reading her words from earlier over and over.
💙
i'm sorry. i'll be back tomorrow night, okay?
i wasn't gonna respond, but something tells me i should.
billie, i don't know why you're afraid, but
i shake my head and backspace.
billie, i don't know why you're afraid, b
billie, i don't know why you're afra
billie, i don't know why you
billie, i don't know w
billie, i don't kn
billie, i do
⭐️
billie
💙
hi
... she's awake?
⭐️
no sleep for you yet either?
💙
no shit
⭐️
be nice.
can we talk?
💙
aren't we
⭐️
no. and don't be so short
no response. what the fuck is her problem now?
💙
star what do u want with me
⭐️
i don't know right now. isn't that fine?
billie's pov
what do i even want?
i start typing, but i just keep deleting everything i wanna say after the first word. it always seems to come out wrong.
suddenly, my phone buzzes. it startles me, but of course i pick up.
"billie, i need you to answer me." star whisper-speaks into the phone.
YOU ARE READING
sleepless nights (b.e.)
Fanfiction★ "but my sleepless nights are better with you than nights could ever be alone." ★ (18+) billie and star have two things in common: neither of them get much sleep, and they're both (maybe) into girls. they're only friends, of course. ☆ lowercase int...
