So Little Time (Frerard) *New Version*

9: This Is A War That Was Lost The Day That It Began

The next week passed in a happy blur of cuddling and endless movie nights, with no disruptions from Frank's father, much to Gerard's surprise. Frank wanted to pretend like everything was normal, and Gerard wasn't in a position to deny him anything, so even though it took a monumental effort, Gerard managed to push all thoughts of Frank's condition to the back of his mind, and simply enjoyed the novelty of having Frank living with him.

Frank had convinced Gerard not to sell his house, making the very valid argument that it probably wouldn't even get any offers before - well...Frank died, and he didn't want Gerard to lose his last connection to Elena for no reason. Gerard had reluctantly agreed, and even though he was terrified of Frank's father coming over and dragging Frank back home, it hadn't happened yet, and hopefully it never would.

Frank assured Gerard he wouldn't go with his father this time, and he was fully prepared to call the police if he tried anything drastic. Gerard really hoped it wouldn't come to that; he didn't want Frank caught up in a legal mess right now, but it did make Gerard smile to hear that Frank was done with his father for good.

Living with Frank was everything Gerard had ever imagined it would be and more; he would never get tired of waking up with Frank beside him, and even menial things like making breakfast became exciting now that he had someone to cook for.

Frank brightened up every moment of Gerard's day, and he regretted waiting so long to ask Frank to move in with him, not to mention the fact that he wouldn't have Frank around for that much longer. Gerard couldn't image what it would be like when Frank was gone, so he simply refused to dwell on it. He didn't want to let his sorrow at what was to come spoiling their time together.

Frank had been unusually quiet today though, and Gerard was beginning to get worried. He looked okay physically; and Gerard didn't think he was having another headache, but Frank had barely spoken a word in the past hour, which was a rare occurrence for the usually talkative boy.

It wasn't like Gerard could blame him though; if he was in Frank's position, he knew he wouldn't be coping half as well, so he was definitely entitled to moping a bit, and Gerard was doing his best not to confront him about it, but that was easier said than done.

"What are you thinking about?" Gerard nudged Frank slightly, his curiosity at Frank's silence finally overwhelming his earlier resolve to leave him be.

"My mom...I miss her. I mean - I know she wasn't the best parent, and I thought I wanted them both out of my life completely, but...I don't know," Frank sighed out, leaning into Gerard's side heavily as he spoke.

"Do you want to go see her, when your dad's not home obviously," Gerard suggested, a grin tugging at the corner of his lips when Frank's face brightened considerably.

"Yeah - I'd like that. I just want to tell her about...you know."

"Yeah - of course, I think she would want to know," Gerard agreed, because even though he wasn't fond of Frank's mother, she did deserve to be aware of what was going on, and Gerard would do anything if it made Frank happy.

"I just want to say goodbye I guess," Frank whispered quietly, and Gerard didn't miss the slight quaver in his voice.

"I - yeah," Gerard answered lamely, all of the thoughts he had kept so carefully locked away came pouring back at Frank's words, and he had to choke back his own tears before Frank saw.

"It's okay Gee, we can't just ignore it forever," Frank smiled weakly, wrapping his arms around Gerard in a tentative embrace.

"I know...I'm sorry, I just - I'm just being silly," Gerard tried to laugh, but it came out in a strangled croak instead.