Maybe, You Will See Me Now

012

She stared at him. A blank expression on her face. It seemed like a while. Andrew understood it was a surprise for her. But he had said it and didn't think it would be healthy for him to withdraw his statement. Out of the blue, she chuckled. Light and a hint of absurdity.

"I don't like your joke. Make a joke with some other topic." Delight addressed and shifted her eyes away from him.

Andrew sighed while he looked away from her. It was quiet and heavy. He relaxed back into his seat, sitting straighter.

"Delight..."

"Is this because I came to your apartment without informing you first?" She interrupted, unable to hold back her words. "Is it because of the kitchen? I don't understand. Why are you making a big deal out of such a little thing?"

"It's not about any of that. You know why I said that. You choose to ignore the reason. The truth. You always have."

Delight relaxed back into her seat, folding her arms below her chest. "Really? I ignore the truth. Please, tell me what truth that might be that you so very well believe I've always known." Her tone was a mix of annoyance and mockery.

At first, he rolled his eyes away from her for a moment. His choice was to ignore her tone. But now, it was clear. He needed to make his words plain and clear so she doesn't misinterpret them again.

"I'm not in love with you. I... I don't think I ever felt anything special for you."

She burst into laughter, shaking her head while she did.

"I'm sorry. It would have been better if I had said something earlier or never accepted to try out dating with you."

Now, she was quiet, staring at him. It felt like a long time and Andrew worried that she wasn't saying anything. He was about to speak up again when she abruptly pushed her chair back. Delight stood up and walked out of where she was. She made her steps towards him.

She rolled her lips in briefly. "I know. Yes, I can be difficult sometimes. Also, my words can be pushy. I'm aware of that. Trust me, I'm working on myself. Give me more time. Give us more time. I'll be better. The perfect woman for you."

"Delight..."

"You're a man. Sometimes men look at other women who aren't their girlfriends or wife. I understand. It's in your nature. If..." She gulped down. "...If that's what happened with you. I f-forgive you." She forced a smile on her face and struggled to prevent it from faltering. Andrew could see how hard that act was for her. He stood up from his seat and stayed in front of her.

"You shouldn't have to settle. You're you. Don't change for me or any man. I'm not the right person for you and there's nothing that can change that."

A tear rolled down her cheek. Although she had tried hard to hold it back in.

"Why? What about me is not loveable for you?" Her voice sounded a little raspy.

"I can't explain it. It's about feelings. It's something that cannot be controlled." Even as he said the words, Andrew felt bad. He wished he didn't have to say such things to her. He knew he was breaking her heart. But it was better now than later.

Delight took a few steps back, away from him. She wiped her cheeks of any tear stains and sniffed to control any from ever rolling down again.

"I don't accept you dumping me. It's not over. You'll see. Someday, we'll laugh about this day and you will tell me how much you love me." Her words were full of certainties for her. She marched away from him to snatch her handbag from the couch. Delight slammed the door behind her after she walked out of the apartment.