i know.

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The songs that i write are always about

some mysterious girl

somebody that nobody knows about.

I mean, of course people know about her.

Everybody knows. 

Everybody knows about her. Everybody knows who they think she is. Everybody knows her name, everybody follows her, everybody thinks she's funny, everybody laughs so hard when they're with her. 

Everybody thinks they know her.

But almost nobody really knows.

But i know.

 I know who she really is.


She's a girl who i wasn't as close with this year.

She's a girl who i've been friends with for six years.

She's a girl whose been more than friends for two.

She's a girl who i loved.

She's a girl who i can never seem to properly get over.

She's a girl who hides things from others.

She's a girl who will do anything for popularity.

She's a girl who's never vulnerable anymore.

She's a girl who isn't very open.

She's a girl who used to know who she is.

She's a girl who has internalised homophobia.

She's a girl who used to love me.

She's a girl who doesn't anymore.

She's a girl who always breaks my heart.




She's so much more than her snapchat profile and a face of makeup.


None of her new friends know.

None of them know who she used to be.

But I know.

I know who she used to be.


She used to be a girl who i'd kiss behind the staircase.

She used to be a girl who i'd sit behind the portables with, painting pinecones blue.

She used to be a girl who loved me.

She used to be a girl who didn't put much thought into her makeup or outfits. 

She used to be a girl who broke my heart.

She used to be a girl who i went back to anyways.

She used to be a girl who i loved.


Right now, she's a girl who shares something with me that nobody else ever will.

Right now,  she's a girl who i'd kill for.

Right now, she's a girl who wouldn't kill for me.

Right now, she's a girl who i still love.


She will be a girl who is super popular.

She will be a girl who figures out who she really is.

She will be a girl who i love. 

She will be a girl who loves somebody.

But she won't love me.



She was a girl who i loved.

She is a girl who i love.

She will be a girl who i love.


Those secrets from the past


Bring memories to the present,


And tears for the future.








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