Where The Numinous Awaits

Ch. 27: Dex's Brother

September 6 | Night

I placed hygiene products, socks, fresh underwear, a change of clothes, and non-perishable food in the corrugated box. My hands shook as I went through the motions, the same way I did every month. This time, however, more than just me would show up at the squatted apartment where Torres stayed.

From the table behind me, Abuela Maya passed me her favorite rosary. "For Torres," she said as she met my gaze. Smiling, she went back to bundling herbs. "They won't judge you, you know."

I whiffled a breath and made an about-face with the care package in hand. "Nixie and Legend have seen me as an academic and as an agent." Toothpaste, deodorant, a gift card for a local eatery. What else did my brother need? I frowned into the box as Abuela rose from her chair with a grunt.

"Yes, and there's more to you than impossibly high standards. Love is vulnerable," she said.

"Having a difficult past is one thing, Abuela, but having a difficult present is another. I don't know why I agreed to a relationship. I have too much emotional baggage, and I can't expect them to take on my problems," I said as I headed to the car.

"Give them a little credit." She shuffled alongside me.

"You're not supposed to know we're together, by the way." I smiled wryly. We hadn't even shared a room yet, much less broadcast our change in relationship status with public displays of affection. Abuela had a nosey streak.

Outside, it was muggy, and the neighborhood beyond my front door smelled of freshly cut grass and late summer flowers. I used my remote key fob to pop the trunk and bumped it open with my hip, depositing the box inside with a heavy sigh.

As I faced Abuela, I knew she could tell that I agonized over the difficult task ahead. I would have to put my shamanic abilities to the test and walk with Delilah into a near-death experience. I didn't need to be distracted by worrying what Legend or Nixie would think about the struggles of my family.

"What if it's too much for them?" I voiced my doubts.

"Oh, they're not the problem, mi corazon. You're the one who needs to practice radical self-acceptance. You can't change who you are or what you come from, and no one should expect you to, least of all yourself."

Radical self-acceptance, I replayed her advice as night fell and the younger members of our team embarked on the latest phase of our quest. Leaving my grandmother behind, e took a rental SUV to the rough side of town where Torres had made his home.

The ground floor apartment was dark and empty, save for a few people sitting against the wall, staring blankly. They had all clearly been using drugs, and their eyes were glazed over. In the middle of the room, a well-dressed young woman slumped in a daze, her head lolling as she tried to look around. Clothes were strewn everywhere, along with various objects that were probably for sale or trade. There was no furniture in the place, and the only light came from the open door, which let in a cool breeze. The air was thick with the smell of body odor and rotting food.

Delilah sauntered through the squalid apartment, stepping over people with her black leather boots. Her eyes swept faces, in search of someone in enough of a liminal space to begin what we had to do. The resuscitation device in my fist did little to make me feel better. "I'll check the bedrooms," the vampire murmured. I nodded anxiously.

Rooted to the filthy carpet of the living room, Nixie scanned her surroundings. I was positive she had never seen anything like this place. She didn't know what to do with her hands, first stuffing them into her pockets and then clasping them in front of her. She shouldered a backpack with The Book of Tides in it. Legend seemed less perturbed. He greeted everyone and then stared at the wall. Fitz had remained outside to keep an eye out for trouble.