Forest floor breaths through remembered shape of my misery
Waiting sanctuary for child who still feels too much
My forest is dark but I am home
Carpet of needles
Leaves form a pillow
Stars are tired of my tears of my rhymes they know I will ask why they remain mute
Sky is black with branches looming over me closing over me mausoleum in nature no one will find you here am I finally safe to be myself
I don't wait I don't listen
I know no one is coming this time cause this time clock is covered in poisonous vines but ruler is on ground my heraldic sword above my head tombstone for the living ghost with golden heart shame light doesn't shine through mist I have become
What would you say if you saw me now would you again fall in love would you still think I am brilliant piece of mind would you still fall for same lies I tell myself to survive that memory of you is more real than pain of living In real world that doesn't have time for dreamers and their bullshit excuses why they are still stuck in mud if their ideas are out of this world
I used up all love my mind had to offer in condolences to spiraling out of control
My words tattered pieces dripping with blood after being torn apart by scraping paper inside my throat
I thought too much till I lost my mind till I lost myself and every delight
Opened my skull
Counted contents till I realised I lost gem I used to be
Someone else lives there nowdays
Hijacked corrupted ruined
Am I ghost haunting ruins of my potential
Or
I am complex system of ruins haunted by ghosts of who I used to be?
Ghost in trees
Blue light tatooted on your face
Is that me?
I wouldn't recognize the face the shadow the outline even if we meet
You still smile when someone mentions my name you still call and knock on my door in the middle of night just to remind me love you saved doesn't die even if darkness is all i believe I deserve to feel all I let sleep inside my bones
Are you still friends with friend who found me?
Or now that he is older he is million miles away lost in bitterness of his mind?
Did you know did you fear did you keep me to keep an eye on me
Tell me its all my sick mind
Tell me monsters can be loved
Teach me how to write without this darkness clogging my mind
Remind me who i was when you brought me back to life that first time
Don't say anything
Silence silence undisturbed flow of silence floating over me
No breeze in forest tonight
Birds circle as pine cones stab my bones
Mud under my nails makes way in my system
Blood is black
Mind is not wailing
It's becoming one with nature
But forest won't let me go easily
It demands to be flooded by river of all my sins before I am absoluted to rest in peace
i did some terrible things
knew he was saving his love, but went back to scene of crime
criminal deep in my heart
addicted to blood
its trauma
it cant be excuse forever
for mind spiriling out of control
this poem had more lines
but they got lost cause universe wanted to defeat me
no one needs to look for me
leave me to forest to deal with my sins my regrets my ghosts
i hide in my mind for only there i am alive
i do not wish to be found
world around me has died
silence is what they wanted from me
but my insides are ripped apart from screams i swallow
no one cares
these words are useless waste of time
i shouldnt feel this hopless for someone this young
but with each passing breath i take
i lose piece of myself that set me apart
the greatest fear is looming over me
did i really ruin all my bridges broke all my clocks lost all my time
is it really too late to get out?
no one wants to talk to me about things i lost things is want
they call me unreasonable
i am criminal for having opinon on my own life
so i write
and hide
in my mind
hoping one morning i will wake up in meadow surranded with trees towering over me
and birds singing and wind whispering 'you are safe here'.
