❝𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐝, 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐟 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥?❞
╰┈➤ 𝐈𝐍 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐂𝐇 a girl who has grown up under cold eyes and an absent father learns to love again- and perhaps how to forgive, as well.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ 𝐩𝐫𝐞-𝐜𝐚𝐧...
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"... and, truth be told, I would prefer dying right now over having a civilized conversation about my taste in books."
cw: sexual implications. DON'T WORRY I SWEAR IT'S NOT WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. IM NOT THAT WEIRD.
『AHIKO』
IT'S BEEN ALMOST TWO hours already, but still no luck.
I toss and turn, kicking my blankets off and pulling them back up, even flipping my pillow a couple times, but I just can't seem to fall asleep. I finally decide I've had enough and slowly slip out of bed, stalking down the hallway and outside of the house for a breath of fresh air. I plop down on the veranda, leaning back onto the heels of my hands as I stare blankly up at the night sky. The stars glitter and shimmer tauntingly, occasionally slipping behind nighttime-grey clouds as I sigh quietly. The steady clack of the bamboo rocker by the koi pond steadily carries through the warm night air, the familiar sound easing me ever so slightly.
But even then, no matter how tightly I squeeze my eyes close or try to drown out the voices in my head, all I can think of is him- of Kagami. How he beat me. He beat me. It wasn't even Hiroshi, the only one who I thought had a chance. No, it was Kagami. Scared, timid, shy, weak little Kagami. Or at least, I thought he was weak. Apparently he has a secret proficiency for genjutsu that surpasses even mine and Hiroshi's; even though it's not like we were amazing in the first place... still. My eyes narrow at the thought, and I lean over the edge of the wooden veranda and down into the koi pond. The fish are invisible without the light of day, and the only thing I'm able to see is myself. My reflection.
My silky white hair draping down over my shoulders as I lean over the edge. My wine-red eyes, the usual luster gone with my disappointmentand frustration. My pinched brows and small frown. But I flinch back as suddenly, it's not me in the pond's reflection anymore- instead, it's the second hokage that's staring up disapprovingly.
I startle, my heart skipping a beat as I stumble back onto my elbows as I rush to escape his pointed gaze; the disappointment in his too-similar ruby eyes. Fear clogs in my throat, fear of him, his displeasure, his chagrin, because of me. Because of my incapability. My imperfection.
I squeeze my eyes shut.
I am his carbon copy. Everything, down to my hair, my eyes, even my facial features- they all belong to him. I'm supposed to be like him- I'm supposed to be perfect like him. I'm supposed to learn everything quickly. To be smart. Strong. Fast. Skilled. Calm. I'm supposed to be the best.
But I'm not.
I massage my temples as my head thunders with too-vivid images and memories, replaying every single failure, every mishap, every time I didn't live up to someone's expectations- every time I wasn't good enough to be the second hokage's daughter.
