Scars

18

                                          Hredhaan

Catastrophe.

A series of tragic events.

Is this how it feels like?

Because I feel like it’s not her it’s me getting ruined.

I feel trapped in my own trap.

I hate myself for feeling anything more than dislike for her.

I hate her so much that it’s difficult to breathe whenever I am in her vicinity. My common sense is thrown somewhere out of the window and my thinking ability becomes devoid of any sensibility.

It’s all her fault.

She is making everything difficult for me.

Because whenever she exerts her rights on me I can’t see anything except her.

At times I feel she does something obscurely mystic to the people around her because it’s impossible that everyone around her grows fond of her after a while.

Except me.

I have just grown to accept that she is a pretty, exceptionally pretty, solitarily exquisite and a walking seductress awakening my non-existent sexual desires.

That’s it.

Nothing else.

It’s the way she came in front me towards the car I wanted to do things to her.

Really bad and dirty things to her.

But she doesn’t need to know it.

Because I myself am confused about everything. Why did I feel her genuine ness when she talked about our professional dynamics? It felt as if she truly wanted us to work. Too bad I don’t want us to work. I want to ruin you so because I don’t like any competition to myself.

I also fail to understand the reason behind me bringing her here to my secret place besides the beach and now on the beach. A secret place which no one knew except me and now she knows too.

I have been sitting here on the sand and she has been running around here and there like a kid from what feels like eternity.

I walk towards her and grab her arm and pull her closer stopping her antique antics.

“I loved your top secret place and the walk on the beach too” she says smiling at me.

“From when did walks started looking like marathons”? I mock her.

She rolls her eyes and then laughs throwing her head back off.

I drag her closer by her waist and her laughter stops.

Just one move and our lips will be sealed.

She closes her eyes and gets on her tip toes.

I can’t believe this is the same person who almost ruined a year of mine at college.

“One hour is over” I tell her.

She looks at me in daze and comes back to reality.

She moves back embarrassed at herself for acting desperate even if it was a weak moment.

I like it.

Though I do want to kiss her.

But I won’t ever let her know how desirable she is.

“Let’s leave then” she speaks.

I nod at her and we leave the place.

We are half way to her apartment in her car when she