Cry, Even Better If You Beg

Chapter 116: Leyla

After the night-long heavy downpour, dawn broke, and morning finally came. Matthias found himself leaning against his wing chair in front of the west window and watched the bright morning sun as it rose from the east.

A cold wind was blowing through the open window, carrying the fresh scent of roses. It seemed as though they bloomed during the onslaught of heavy rains yesterday.

He soon found himself bitterly chuckling at the irony.

Even though the season had come for roses to bloom, Leyla was no longer here to witness it. And during the time when he expected all living creatures to go back home and make his world livelier, his bird would suddenly die.

Matthias cast his eyes at the now-empty cage where his canary had lived.

The only things that indicated it had been lived in were the several yellow feathers scattered all over it and the bowls of uneaten rice and water. Those were the only things his canary left behind to remind him of its existence.

His bird was gone.

Matthias' eyes shifted back to the table in front of him. On top of it was a small wooden box that embraced the cold body of his canary. Its once soft and minuscule body had hardened into a position of eternal sleep. The memories he had with it slowly filled his head, and he had no choice but to let it take him back to those times.

He remembers seeing it first as a small bird, an assuming creature that captured his heart with one glance. He enjoyed seeing the bird gradually being tamed by him.

It used to thrash loudly and flee whenever he was near it, but then its countenance had mellowed, and he could gradually tame its spirit. The joy he felt back then was so pure and unexplainable. It filled his heart like the way a lovely song could fill a room.

The knowledge that it was a being under his domain...

That it was utterly his...

Also made its affection taste sweeter.

It brought him so much pleasure in the way the bird would just chirp happily and play in his room, the way its eyes would search for him around its vicinity...

And the way he could run his fingers against its soft feathers while it sat on the back of his hand just staring at him were moments of great pleasure and he loved every second of it.

But now...

These memories were nothing but ashes of a once burning flame.

He got up from his chair, approached the table, and then reached out and slowly stroked its cold body. The feathers of its golden wings were still so soft that he could almost believe that the bird would open its eyes again and fly toward him at any moment.

That it was fine, he told himself...

He still had his canary.

They told him they did not know the reason for his bird's death. It just died like that.

Perhaps, it was suffering in silence with him, until anxiety drowned it in its vicious arms, and drained the life out of it.

And just like that, it was gone forever from his life...

Much like the way she left him.

Like Leyla...

For a long time, Matthias remained in a catatonic state. He just sat across the table and stared at the body of his dead bird in silence. He appeared to be waiting for it to flap its wings and sing its sweet songs once again, just like it used to do when the bright morning came after a night of heavy rain.