SMG4 Oneshots & Short Stories | SMG4

💙🤍 🗝️🪷 Everything Will Be Alright (SMG4 x PTSD!Reader)

Art by 'Katkarapu' on Discord

TWs // Intrusive thoughts, Panic Attack, Trauma

🤍⚪️ Y/N's POV:

🤠 - 🎰 Time/Arc: Western Spaghetti - WOTFI 2023

'IT'S GOTTA BE PERFECT!!!' My thoughts yelled again and again, showing me pictures of the man that I loved so much in his insane state, until, finally, I burst into tears. I... I couldn't do this anymore. I put my hands over my ears, shut my eyes tight, and just tried to focus on something else. Anything else.

"Come on, Y/N! That was months ago! He's completely fine now! You need to get over it!" I whispered, begging myself to just accept what had happened and leave it behind. SMG4 was insane almost a year ago now, yet... Why couldn't I shake the feeling that something was wrong? Like he was still in danger from an imminent threat? Like...

My breathing suddenly sped up, and tears began to fill my eyes, my head spinning as I tried to focus on one particular point in my eyesight. My legs suddenly gave way underneath me, and I crumpled to the floor, trying to do anything and everything to just catch my breath. 'No! Not now! Why now?!'

Suddenly, I heard the door to the room I was in open and a mid-pitch male voice, which was laced with an Australian accent, say something. But, as hard as I tried, I just couldn't figure out what it was saying.

The next thing I knew, the man was directly next to me, holding my hand tightly yet gently. Even through my tears, I could roughly make out messy black hair and concerned dark blue eyes as I looked at his face.

'...SMG4!' I thought, realising who it was. I felt my heart start to beat a little quicker as love entered it once more. Yet something else entered me too: fear.

SMG4 was the thing that I was fearing. The one I was terrified of losing the most. The one that had gone insane all those months ago now. The real reason why I was having this panic attack. He was only going to make things worse.

Slowly, I wrapped my knees up into my chest, being able to move again now that I wasn't alone, but my eyes were still flooding waterfalls down me and my clothes were already starting to become relatively damp. Closing my eyes again, I just tried to focus on my breathing. I needed to get that under control before anything else, and then I could figure out what to do next.

[Timeskip until Y/N can breathe normally again with SMG4's help]

"Do you think you can tell me what's wrong?" 4 asked, smiling gently and sweetly at me. "Two of us holding the weight of it could be better than just one. And whatever it is is clearly hurting you."

I looked at him nervously in response. 'Could I tell him what was on my mind? How would he react to it if he knew the truth? Would he dump me instantly if he knew?' My mind thought panickedly, and I looked at the wooden floor beneath me, still shaken from my breakdown.

"If you don't want to tell me, that's fine too."

"No... That's not it... I..." I stammered out, wanting to tell him but at the same time unsure of myself.

'I need to tell him. It's now or never.' I thought, and, knowing that that was true and that it was about time that my boyfriend knew the truth, I let out a sigh.

"I... I'm still dealing with trauma from It's Gotta Be Perfect." I admitted looking into his captivating oceanic blue eyes.. "It... It broke me when you were insane 4. I thought I'd lost you... permanently..."

The man grabbed me tightly in response, holding me close to him as more tears flooded onto both of our clothes, neither of us saying anything; we didn't need to say anything to show that we cared. We both loved each other so much and had gone through so much together this past year.

"Everything will be alright," he whispered into my ear. "Everything will be alright, I promise. Just... try not to think about it, okay?"

I nodded my head subtly in response, looking at his caring expression with a half-smile upon my tear-stained face.

702 words