my sweetest love // bnd hyeokmyungz

4. "you're mine, i think."

It was almost 3am, yet Sanghyeok was still awake. It was rather unusual for him, seeing as he much rather preferred sleeping properly over getting distracted by his phone, but what was even more unusual was the fact that Jaehyun had sent him a message — as if he knew that he was awake.

때혀니
> oi
> u awake bruv

땅혀키
> why are you texting me like that
> and yes, i am

때혀니
> meet me outside :D

땅혀키
> do you want me to get shot first thing in the morning

때혀니
> im bored
> okay, then, can i come over?

땅혀키
> i repeat

때혀니
> YAWWWNNN
> boring 😐
> you're boring 😐

땅혀키
> yeah, so what? 😒

때혀니
> i'm gonna sneak in
> let's have a really late sleepover :3

땅혀키
> jaehyun, you can't sleep over anymore

때혀니
> WHA
> WHY D:

땅혀키
> because you're in love with me and i feel a little weird about being alone in a room with you

There was a moment of silence in their conversation and Sanghyeok couldn't help but feel that he messed up. Jaehyun didn't respond to his message for a good five minutes before a singular buzz indicated his response. Sanghyeok opened the message, heart racing nervously as he read over the words.

때혀니
> sanghyeok, do i make you uncomfortable?

땅혀키
> meet me outside.

Sanghyeok dropped his phone to the bed, silently glancing about for a hoodie he could put on. He managed to find one, throwing it over his head and ever so quietly leaving his room. Both of his parents weren't particularly light sleepers, but he couldn't help but be cautious anyway.

He managed to put the passcode into his front door, quickly opening to minimise any creaking and closed it quickly but quietly behind him. Jaehyun already sat outside on the pavement, gaze focused on the street in front of their houses. Sanghyeok walked over to his friend, sitting down beside him quietly.

"You would never do this normally."

"True — but you need reassurance."

The two sat in silence — a painful but much needed silence. Sanghyeok eventually turned his head to face Jaehyun and the two met eyes. The taller male smiled, resting his head against his legs. "Go on. Reassure me."

"You're my best friend, Jaehyun," Sanghyeok muttered. "Never in a million years did I ever think that you'd fall in love with me. We met each other in middle school, decorating that old skateboard together with random stickers. Nothing could have ever said that you would fall for me. So... why? Why me? After knowing me for all these years, why do you like me?"

Jaehyun thought quietly to himself for a moment before chuckling. "I can't think of a single reason. I'm just meant to like you. There's just something about you — something that makes me want to... love you. Yeah, maybe it's just a crush, but I'm really enjoying this feeling. I love being in love — especially with you."

"You shouldn't love me, Jaehyun," Sanghyeok said, a sad smile on his lips. "I shouldn't be more than a friend to you. I... I can't allow myself to fall in love with my best friend."

"I've already decided that we'll be together one day," Jaehyun chuckled, lifting his head. "Whether it's ten minutes, ten days, ten months or ten years — I'll be with you one day, I swear."

"You're hopeless."

"And you're mine."

Sanghyeok looked away, cheeks burning a bright red before clearing his throat. "Sh-shut up."

Jaehyun laughed at the other's embarrassed expression, keeping his eyes on the ground again. "I'll be less assertive, though — clearly it's a bit of a problem, so... just to make you less uncomforta—"

Jaehyun widened his eyes, freezing in place when he felt a quick, unfamiliar feeling against his cheeks. Sanghyeok stared back at Jaehyun, eyes locking for a moment before he quickly stood up. "Don't go sleep so late. Maybe that's why you can't wake up in the morning."

"Sanghyeok, did you just kiss—"

"I'll see you at the park this afternoon — if I don't get found out about sneaking," Sanghyeok interrupted with a laugh. "Goodnight, Jaehyun."

Sanghyeok turned around, walking back into his yard and closing the door behind him quietly. Jaehyun was still in shock, but his expression morphed into a bright grin as he punched the air excitedly. "Sanghyeok kissed me! He kissed my cheek!" He jumped in place, clearly excited about what had just happened. "Sanghyeok kissed my cheek..."

Jaehyun would be happy for a long time.

Sanghyeok, in the meantime, leaned against the door of his bedroom while covering his mouth with his hand. He knew he had completely eradicated any chance of getting Jaehyun to move on, but he somehow preferred it. If his father ever found out, he'd be in deep trouble — and he really didn't feel like dealing with his father anymore.

With a sigh, Sanghyeok went over to his bed, picking up his phone as he threw his duvet over his body. He smiled, seeing a new message from Jaehyun already. He locked his phone, staring up at the ceiling happily. Maybe he liked Jaehyun too — but what if he was just tricking himself again? What if he liked Jaehyun because Jaehyun liked him — not because he had grown feelings for him?

Sanghyeok was conflicted all over again. Maybe he shouldn't have kissed Jaehyun. But maybe doubting his own feelings was what led to him rejecting Jaehyun. Maybe if he allowed himself — against his father's wishes — to finally fall in love, he'd be happier. Jaehyun made him happy, after all.

He wanted to continue being by Jaehyun's side, but it would be difficult to do so as friends due to Jaehyun's flourishing feelings of romance. Maybe falling in love was okay.

Maybe liking Jaehyun was okay.

"... I should kiss his cheek again tomorrow."