PHIGHTING! Oneshots

🍊Rattlesnake Bite-SCYTHEHAMMER🔨👢

Simplicity, guys. And Scythe's name is Jackie, Ban Hammer's name is Tremor. Somebody TOTALLY requested this. It's TOTALLY not a reason for me to write something about Scythe.

Once again, the well-known serial killer was at it again, on the run. With Tremor tailing right behind her in the rain. "Ya can't keep runnin', old lady!"

"Old lady?! That's no way to talk to a girl!~" Jackie pulls out her scythe, hooking it to a building, the blade passing through like butter before jumping onto it and pulling it out, boosting her to the top of a building. Tremor follows right behind, but actually climbs it, oddly fast for having a 100-pound hammer on his back. He looks at the roofs of all buildings where he is. A lot of rain and fog, but no Jackie. He climbs onto the building, hammer in hand before he is suddenly toppled to the ground by a pair of feet on his back. Jackie. With her scythe in hand, She raises it, ready to give him a blow to end all of the quarreling. But as she swung, something stopped her. Not a hand. Not a hammer. But something else. Nothing was in her way, and yet her hands halted right when the blade was about to touch his neck.

"Fine...you got me. Just finish the...?" Tremor looks back, seeing her with a clear shot. But something was up. Her hat covered her eyes, her glossy white hair wet from the rain. Only the sound of the harsh water falling onto the world around them was heard. What a feeling of nostalgia. The two had been quarreling for years. Since the two were just teens, they had been at each other's throats. They were friends in the form of rivals. But it felt like they were children again.

The first time she won a fight.

The first time she killed.

The first time she was chased.

The first time she felt...sad. Sad to get another kill. But that next kill being someone like him. He had an ego bigger than the biggest black hole in any place in the universe, don't get her wrong. But seeing someone like that go felt like...losing. Not just a battle but what her entire life she has been running from.

Did she really want to be free?

...

She slumped, falling onto her knees and dropping her scythe. Jackie felt in control, but powerless. But with this window, Tremor got on top of her, with his hammer above-head. He was ready to kill her until he saw the fear in her eyes. He had seen tons of fear in tons of eyes. But this felt way too surreal. He groaned, giving up and throwing his hammer to the side with Jackie's scythe. "Jackie, you bitch, if you start crying I'll actually crush you." Jackie chuckled weakly, her tears being unseen by the rain. "Stop that."

"Wh-Who knew...h-huh...?"

"You crying is like watching a dog get sad when you pass it in the shelter." She chuckled again, trying to wipe her tears away. But they keep flowing. He grabs her face, wiping the tears. When they didn't go away the first time, he grumbled, picking her up by the back of her shirt. Jackie looked over at Tremor, watching as he took her wherever. Hopefully not Banlands, though. Anywhere but-

"Whuh-?" After thinking and crying a lot, she is met by something soft on her rear; a couch. "Where the hell am I?"

"My momma's. She's busy doing god stuff so we're alone right now."

"Great. Now why am I here?"

"Oh, well if you would prefer, I could hole-in-one you back to Lost!"

"No thanks."

"Good. Now..." Tremor tuns off the lights suddenly, turning on a bedside lamp and keeping it near so it seems like an interrogation room. "Why didn't you kill me?"

"Is this an interrogation? You ain't the coppers!"

"Oh, yes I am!"

"Oh...then I plead the fifth."

"Wha- YOU CAN'T JUST DO THAT!!"

"Anything I say or do can and WILL be used against me. So I plead. The. Fifth."

"Fine. Can you at least tell me WHY you didn't kill me?"

"...I...don't know." Tremor raises an eyebrow, peeking his eyes out of his blindfold, and pulling the cloth down to his neck. "I mean...we've been through it. So much time has passed between us. Like when I did my first...everythin' and everythin'. You were always there. Through all of my wrong-doings, you were always nearby or around the corner of my consequences. The feelin' of losin' you feels so surreal. Like a dream. But it's a dream I ain't never wanted to come true." Jackie's voice cracked as she talked, looking down, tears slowly formed in her eyes. The tears dripped onto her balled-up fists. "You're my hunter but...you're my partner...does it make sense." Tremor taps his foot, turning the light in the room back on and turning the lamp on.

"...Unfortunately."

"...hopefully this doesn't make me seem like some puny lil' girl like when I was a lil' girl." Tremor grabs Jackie by the chin, looking up at him. He gently moved closer, slowly getting on top of her. Jackie realized what was happening, grabbing him by the scruff and pulling him in, collecting his lips into hers for a tender kiss. The two keep it going for a good few before parting. Jackie lets out an uncontrollable giggle. "Can't believe you have a crush on lil' old me.~"

"Ohoho you're not old. And you're not little, either, sweetheart.~"

"Less talking, cutie." Jackie pulls him closer, as they begin to make out on the couch, Tremor slowly making his way on top of him. She gently strokes the back of his head, letting her hands flow through his dreads. "Your kiss game is weak, squirt.~"

"Shut it, child."

I love her. Word count:1008 shortest story I've ever written in 2024.