143 | Chanmin

T H I R T E E N

Before the unrequited regrets, before Bangchan came into his life, and even before he had feelings for anyone at all, life was much more simple back then. Nothing else could compare to the mornings he would wake up to all by himself, with the silence in the house to share with his own enthusiasm towards the day. To another's distasteful eyes, it might seem he was everything but adventurous as he would normally spend his free days at home, cleaning and cooking, sometimes spending a few minutes on a puzzle in the living room. And when his casual days were busy, he was normally focused on school work and studying with his friend, Han Jisung, right at the end of the library, were barely anybody would go back then.

But one day, right in the middle of autumn, did all of that come to a sudden halt. 

And on that one day did things start getting shook up straight away. 

'You're here early' Seungmin said, looking to his right to see Han opening his locker and pull out two paperback books in one go.

'What do you mean I'm early today? I'm always on time' he responded, closing his locker and looking at Seungmin with a disagreeing face. 

'Being on time and being early are two different things, Han. And you've never been the second one-'

'What? No...they're the same. I think the loneliness at home is getting in your head, man. You having trouble communicating? Or is it your thought process that is broken?'

'Nothing is broken, Han, I'm fine. And speaking of being home alone, you should give it a try sometime, it really lets you relax without disruptions from others'

'Is this another one of your "try before you deny" revelations again?" he asked, as Seungmin closed his locker with his only free hand (the other one holding a large, blue binder).

'It's not a revelation Jisung, it's just common knowledge-'

'Common knowledge that only a house plant like you follows, and besides, don't you think it's good to touch some grass every now and then? You know, get all of those toxins in your body-'

'It's oxygen, Han, not toxins. Remember what our science teacher taught us last year, about how one of them is bad and another is good? You just said the complete opposite to what he stated'

'Yeah yeah...okay fine. So I'm half asleep this morning and my alarm went off earlier than normal, and the coffee machine isn't working at the convenience store so just maybe you could cut me some slack?' he asked, slapping one of the books to his face in annoyance.

'I just wanna go home' he continued, hitting it once again to his face in a much more softer way than before.

Seungmin didn't seem to see the world through the same eyes as Han, who would normally complain and whine with every chance he got about school. But Seungmin didn't see school in such a bad, negative way and rather instead, as a way to grow, and thrive for the near future. 

But since this day, Seungmin has always thought differently.

'Who's that?' Han curiously asked, making Seungmin turn to his right only to see his eyes focus on a boy, walk towards their direction in a slightly confused manner. 

'I don't know...I've never seen him around before' Seungmin replied, watching as the guy re-styled his messy fringe with a hand free from his leather satchel.

His hair was the colour of sherbet orange, and his outward nature seemed completely harmless to Seungmin's belief. But his facial features gave off the look of a completely different persona and rather instead, made Seungmin wonder if he really was a nice person after all.

His eyes were a misleading case, and his pink, candy coloured lips, were pursed together like he had never smiled before in his life. His eyebrows defined his sharp look even more, and soon enough, he had made eye contact with Seungmin right away, making him walk right up to the two and stand there, a good few meters apart without hesitance.

'Hey chestnut, you know where the office is?' he asked, looking at Seungmin with a small smile across his mouth, something Seungmin thought he would not do earlier.

'Excuse me?' Seungmin replied, making the boy turn his chin up a bit higher and look slightly down on him.

'Um, hi there. Um, my name is Han and the one that you just called chestnut, his name is Seungmin and well, I'd be happy to show you were the office is if you want-' Han tried saying, before the boy cut him off without hesitance.

'I'm sorry, Han, but I was never talking to you in the first place. I mean, I just don't see why you needed to say that considering I asked your friend first, not you ' he responded, making Han feel dejected in a way he could not explain.

'Now, as I was saying, you don't happen to know where the office is, do you?' the guy asked, now looking directly at Seungmin and blocking Han with his back, his full body now turned to face him while blocking out the rest of the world.

How inconsiderate did this guy have to be?

'Yeah, I'm sorry, but you'll just have to go find the office yourself...Lee know' Seungmin replied in a defiant voice, looking at the guy's satchel tag to see his name inscribed on the metal pin in Hangul. 

'Besides, I don't think it would be wise if we joined anyway, me and Han have classes soon and we'll be late if we go with you. So start walking' Seungmin continued, making the guy let out an annoyed sigh, look at Han and then back at Seungmin, before clicking his tongue in hidden anger.

'You know, I was just asking for where the office was-'

'And Han volunteered to help you, but you turned him down. We don't want to talk to you anyway' Seungmin snapped back, pulling Han by the wrist and walking away from Lee know as the guy put his two hands back on the strap of his satchel in slight anger. 

'Seungmin, he's new to the school, of course he's gonna be a bit antsy at the start' Han spoke, making Seungmin get even more annoyed by the second.

'Seungmin, stop, you're making such a big deal out of this-' Han continued, trying to pull out of Seungmin's grip in haste.

'I'm not, he's the one that's making it hard. I guarantee you he's a bad person, I mean, are you just gonna let someone like him step on you like that? He ignored you, Han, ignored you, and then he put all of the attention on me. Who does that?'

'...Yeah but, he still seems nice' Han replied as Seungmin finally let go of his wrist, some students in the hall looking their way and whispering between one another as they both continued down the hall shortly after. 

Little did Seungmin know that Han would eventually grow extremely close to Lee Know in the coming months from now. 

'We could use another boy in the friend circle you know?' he added, nudging Seungmin in the left arm playfully.

╭── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╮

Lee Know was the problem. 

He always has been.

And after such a beautiful moment shared with such an angel of a man, it only made Seungmin feel less happier than needed in his own head. 

The dark streets didn't scare him anymore, nor did the loneliness, but the only thing that sent him in spirals was the thought of him.

The thought of Lee Know.

The thought that he wanted to ruin something in his life, something that he finally has after so long, and snap it in half like it was nothing to him. The thoughts present only made him hesitate at a second shot in response.

'Are you sure you don't want me to walk you home?' Bangchan asked earlier, as Seungmin started biting at his nails in slight fear.

'No, I'll walk home by myself, thanks for offering though' he responded, walking past Bangchan without giving him a single warning.

'But Seungmin, it really is late-' 

'I'll be fine, see you tomorrow' Seungmin said back, 

EDIT: Just realized I have to go back to the previous chapter and re-edit it for some mistakes. Sorry for the delay!

(/▽＼)!